Saleswanking 2015

Screen Shot 2015-12-31 at 11.03.47 AMThese are December’s numbers; I just spent an hour and a half or so getting my 2016 spreadsheet set up.  December was down from the last couple of months, but that’s not a surprise, and I sold three times as many books in December 2015 as I did in 2014 so I’m calling it a win.  As always, click to make that legible.

I had a goal for 2015: I wanted other human beings to give me one thousand dollars of American money in return for things I wrote.  And I have good news!  By certain measurements, I beat that number by over fifty percent.

Unfortunately, by other measurements, I spent a lot more money playing author than I earned, mostly because of my insistence on attending a couple of conventions this year and paying early for one of the ones that I’m going to next year.  Conventions have yet to be a profit center, is what I’m saying.  Not even close.  But I think they’re useful, and I’m doing at least two of them in 2016 and may be doing as many as four or five.  If they bankrupt me, I’ll try something else for 2017.  This needs to turn some sort of profit soon, even if it’s just a tiny one.

My books were downloaded or purchased 2350 times in 2015, up from 524 in 2014, an increase that is frankly outstanding even if a lot of those were giveaways.  During that time I released two new books, The Sanctum of the Sphere and Searching for Malumba.  I plan on two more new releases in 2016, a sequel to Skylights in (hopefully, although the window to get this done is closing) March and a second fiction book late in the year that I haven’t definitely decided on.  Other goals for 2016 include being published at least once by someone who isn’t me.  I’ve been lucky enough to have stories published in both extant volumes of the World Unknown Reviewbut I think 2016 needs to be the year where I break into traditional publishing somehow.  Note that I’ll count it as good if the contract is signed next year; the story itself doesn’t actually have to come out, but I want a traditional publishing sale next year.  I would also like to see at least 4000 more books in the hands of readers.  That’s a pretty ambitious increase over this year; we’ll see if I make it.

And I kinda want to write a screenplay and a comic book, just for the hell of it.  I have no plans to try and sell either of them, and this isn’t the first year I’ve said “write a screenplay,” but they’d be fun to try and do.

(Oh, and audiobooks.  Audiobooks, dammit!  At least of BA 1!)

I am sticking with Kindle Select for the foreseeable future, as well.  My ebooks will remain exclusive to Amazon, as I have better sales when exclusive to Amazon than I do when I make my books available everywhere.  Sooner or later Amazon will piss me off again and I’ll diversify again, but for now, Amazon’s where you’re going to have to go to get one of my ebooks.

Or, y’know, email me, and we’ll work something out for your other device.  You can always do that.

But yeah.  In April of 2014, I had no books available at all.  As of now, I have this:

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I dunno about you, but I feel pretty damn good about that.

Thank you, genuinely, so, so, so much to everyone who has helped me on this; I hope the stories have been worth it.

Now go review them!

#Fridayfictioneers: Requests

PHOTO PROMPT © Jean L. Hays

“You bring this to me,” he said.  “Why?”

“They say Papa Ortell’s network is the best.”

“Papa Ortell is an old fat man who wants to be alone with his croissant and coffee,” he spat.  “Not to be bothered by… supplicants.”  It was an insult.

“Jezka’s been gone a week,” I said. “Jezka owes me money.  So Jezka owes you money.”

He laughed, a short, brutal sound with no mirth.  “Jezka pays to find Jezka, eh?  Clever.  Now go away.”  He waved a hand.  And his eyes glowed, ice blue.

I felt bad for the kid. But not much.

Word Count: 99


Friday Fictioneers is a weekly blog hop hosted by Rochelle. She posts a photo prompt then challenges readers to write a 100 word story inspired by the prompt. It’s a fun challenge. Give it a try! Check here for the info then write your story and post it, link up and enjoy the other stories!

A very brief thing I realized

m5P3qlE.jpgI will probably stomp on this post in, like, an hour when I write something new– today has potential to be kinda posty, actually– but I just realized something.  I jumped on WordPress the other day because they appear to have removed my ability to access my site’s lifetime geography/country stats.

It hit me last night that, at least within my somewhat limited understanding of how the interwebs work, a possible good reason for that is that WordPress just emailed every single subscriber a link to a new site including a custom map for their blogs, and that perhaps that volume of map-clickery and map-generatery is putting strain on a server somewhere.  So they removed the older version temporarily to keep from borking the site.

I’m going to spend a few days assuming it will be back once the “Ooh, my annual report is here!” excitement wears off.

(If you know more about how the interwubs work than I do, and this explanation doesn’t make any sense, do me a favor and just let me stew in my own ignorance.  At this particular moment I’d prefer to think that this was done for a good reason  and I’m willing to be mildly wrong for a short time about a relatively irrelevant thing if it means something makes sense.)

More later.  I seriously have two other posts I want to get done today, and it may actually be three.

Challenge met!

scrambled-eggs.pngDid my typical pre-post GIS for “scrambled eggs” and that image came up.  Can you tell those are supposed to be scrambled eggs?  Because I’m not sure I can.

You may recall the Baked Egg Challenge, where my son was forced by his doctor to eat cupcakes in steadily increasing amounts until she became convinced that the eggs contained within the cupcake mix were not going to cause him anaphylaxis or death.  At the time I thought it would be six months until the Scrambled Egg Challenge; it turned out to be just over a year.  We were at the doctor’s from 8:00 AM until after one, feeding the boy steadily increasing amounts of premade, reheated scrambled eggs, which sounds kinda gross to me but he wolfed them down.

It turns out that eggs will not kill him.  We were cautioned to avoid things with runny yolks for a bit longer, but it ain’t difficult to avoid fried eggs and I’ll be damned if I’m poaching him anything so we ought to be okay.

In other news, the cat yanked me out of a sound sleep at 2:30 in the morning by puking on my bed, and it’s been close to a week since I had more than three hours or so of sleep at a time, because I absolutely can not get a full night’s sleep in December apparently.  So I was a zombie through the entire Challenge and I’m not much better now.

End of year book saleswanking tomorrow.  I will try and get one more post up today and actually be a little bit entertaining.

WordPress Year in Blogging

…not a whole lot that I didn’t say earlier today, but it’s right here.  Have you gotten yours yet?

Blogwanking 2015

Fun thing about Macs that I didn’t realize until a few days ago:  most of us know about using control-shift-3 to take a screenshot.  Did you know that if you use control-shift-4 you can then draw a rectangle on the screen and it just screencaps that part?  No need to crop!

Anyway, here’s how this year went:

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That’s with 636 posts published.  Here’s 2014’s details:

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Now, that’s all skewed to hell by the Syria post, which, again, got over 100,000 pageviews and who knows how many viewers; it’s currently sitting at 38,000 FB shares, so… a lot?  What I find interesting: I didn’t miss a single day of posting in 2015, and I’ll be damned if I miss tomorrow or Thursday.  But I had fewer posts, since 2014 had 779 of them, and a lot less engagement– 1000 fewer comments and 3000 fewer Likes.  I would not have expected that.  Tons more unique viewers, though; I was way up on that (nearly double) before the Syria thing hit.  In other words: I reached a lot more people this year, even before the viral post, but they aren’t spending as much time on the blog or talking/communicating nearly as much as the 2014 people did.  My ratio of views to visitors in 2014 was insane.  That went away in 2015.

Geography!  Here’s my top 10 countries:

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I’m going to go out on a limb and suggest that with maybe a bit of fiddling toward the bottom these are probably just about everyone’s top countries. I see no reason why my blog would be more popular in, say, France than anyone else’s.  Maybe I’m wrong.

Full global reach, 2015:

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Just about everywhere, basically.  Here’s the lifetime of the blog:

…oh, god damn it, they’re screwing with this again.  Well: Greenland fills in, and all of South America, and another country or two in Africa, and a few tiny islands.    I’ll upload the image if I can find it.  Shit.  I NEED MY LIFETIME GEOGRAPHY, WORDPRESS.

Grrrrrrr.

Referrers?  Sure, why not, although this is skewed by the Syria post again:

Screen Shot 2015-12-29 at 8.26.03 AM.png

Not much to say here, I guess, other than to wonder what exactly is causing the 127.0.0.1 referrals.  I tend to get a handful a week but not many more than that; if they ever spike I’ll look into them more closely.

So, that’s my 2015.  How was yours?  Saleswanking tomorrow or the day after.

Top 10 Posts of 2015

Scalzi did his list today, which reminded me that I haven’t done mine. See if you notice a theme here.  Asterisks are next to posts that weren’t written this year:

  1. In Which I Tell You How Your Religion Works (105,278 views)
  2. SNOWPIERCER: I hated, hated, hated, hated, HATED this movie (12,925 views) (*)
  3. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: BOB ZOOM (3,653 views)
  4. In which the kids are fine, shut up (2,921 views) (*)
  5. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: OCTONAUTS (2,623 views)
  6. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: CURIOUS GEORGE (2,158 views) (*)
  7. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: COLOR CREW (1,642 views) (*)
  8. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: PEG + CAT (1,197 views) (*)
  9. In Which My Kid is Weird as Hell (1,193 views) (*)
  10. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: BUSYTOWN MYSTERIES (876 views) (*)

All but three of those are connected to children’s shows, since the Weird as Hell bit is actually about Curious George.  Clearly I need to adapt the blog and just talk about kids’ TV all the time, because it gets ridiculous traffic when I do.  The Kids are Fine was Freshly Pressed in January, and we all know about the damn Syria and Snowpiercer posts.

Most of those, you’ll note, are from previous years.  If I restrict this to only posts written in 2015, here’s the list:

  1. In Which I Tell You How Your Religion Works (105,278 views)
  2. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: BOB ZOOM (3,653 views)
  3. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: OCTONAUTS (2,623 views)
  4. Blood Transfusions Don’t Work Like That: A Review of MAD MAX: FURY ROAD (787 views)
  5. STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS is a miserable, wonderful mess of a movie: a spoiler-filled review (464 views)
  6. In Which I Refuse to Shut Up:  A Response to Delilah Dawson (391 views)
  7. How to Launch Your New Book: Everything I Know (361 views)
  8. Creepy Children’s Programming Reviews: PINGU (319 views)
  9. GUEST BLOG: I watched Jessica Jones, and My Hands Froze, by James Wylder (299 views)
  10. In Which I am Way Ahead of Myself (242 views)

This is a teeny bit more diverse, adding a couple of movie review posts and a few about writing; the #9 post, not written about me, was about television and responding to/dealing with trauma, and is probably the most important of the ten.  The only one I don’t really get was #10, which basically benefited from being written the same day as the Syria post and got a lot of secondhand attention as a result.

Tomorrow or the day after, general 2015 blogwanking, and probably a saleswanking post not long after that.  This was a really interesting year.

Interview with Darkfyre Entertainment at Starbase Indy

I haven’t actually watched this yet.  Well, okay, I got through like my first sentence and then decided I couldn’t watch any more, because the sight of me on video is kind of terrifying.

But YOU can watch it if you want.  My first video interview!  Woo!