In which I am supposed to be a tech person

This is my desktop setup:

You will note that TweetDeck is on the right, smaller monitor, and that Scrivener is on the left, larger monitor, which is also the actual computer. That’s how I want it.

Tweetdeck opens in the primary monitor nine times out of ten, and if there’s a pattern to that tenth time I can’t find the goddamn thing. Scrivener opens in the secondary monitor every single time.

I understand that this is very much a first world goddamn problem but it is driving me nuts. I assure you I have Googled the shit out of this and I cannot find a solution that actually works to getting those apps to open where I want them, so if one of you could Google it and post the first link, which will be something I have never seen before and will solve the problem immediately, I would appreciate it. This issue has clearly decided that it will not be resolved until I am at least moderately humiliated and fuck it at this point I’m fine with that.

(Note that any solution involving right-clicking on an app and going to “options” no longer works with Mojave.)

And because it’s probably relevant:

(I have no idea if anything nasty can be done with the serial number for my computer, but I figure let’s not take chances.)

Random Facebook PSA

I figured out something about Facebook, just a minute ago, that explains something that has been annoying me for months. I thought about sharing this on actual Facebook, but the blog post will get cross-posted there anyway so why not. Double blog day!

Anyway. Those of you who run Pages in addition to your personal site may have noticed something: Facebook helpfully informing you that your mom, or your wife, or someone else who you know good and goddamn well has Liked your page has commented on a post or something like that, and hey, wouldn’t it be great to invite those people to Like your page?

Well, sure, except they already do, and I know that, so please stop bothering me with this shit.

It’s one of those stupid things that gets on my nerves every once in a while– in other words, it’s everything about Facebook, an entire fucking ecosystem designed to do nothing but 1) allow me to have some small access to the lives of maybe literally five people who I’d completely fall out of touch with otherwise and 2) find endless ways to annoy me and/or utterly destroy society in the meanwhile.

I need to kill Luther’s Facebook page. This has been true for a while; my Clark Kent FB page has been gone for forever and is never coming back but those five people and the vague idea that the FB page drives traffic here has kept it around. I literally think about killing the page every day and don’t do it.

Anyway.

Here’s the thing I just figured out, since this wasn’t supposed to be an exclusively “bitch about Facebook” post: that list it’s drawing from, where it’s telling you to invite people to Like your page who have already Liked your page?

All of those people found your site on their own and were never invited to like it.

That’s why it’s repeating those names. It’s not comparing those people to the list of people who have Liked the page, it’s comparing them to a list of people who you have invited to Like the page. And if you never invited them because they are your wife and/or your mom and they did it right away when you first opened the page? Well, it’s gonna bug you about those people forever, as far as I know, because just because I understand why Facebook is doing the dumb and annoying thing it’s doing does not mean that the thing it’s doing is not still dumb and annoying, or that there’s any way to stop it from being dumb and annoying. It’s Facebook. Dumb and annoying are what it’s for.

But hey: at least I get it now. It’s stupid, but I get it. And so do you!

You may now go about your day.

Yikes

Photo by Jason Wagner.

Midwesterners are occasionally not very smart people.

I was starting to get ready to put the boy to bed last night when suddenly the civil defense alarms started going off. Normally the alarms don’t happen until after the National Weather Service has already kicked out some watches and warnings, and I hadn’t seen anything, so I posted a quick message to Facebook asking if anybody knew anything and we went about our business. It took maybe another 10 minutes for my phone to start blowing up, and even when it did, it was all “radar indicates rotation” type of stuff and no actual someone sees a tornado types of warnings. I feel like now that they’re doing “radar indicates rotation” as a threat level, we need a new word for that. Tornado warning always meant someone has actually seen a funnel cloud to me and I don’t know how seriously to treat your radar tornadoes.

Anyway, we didn’t go hide in the bathtub, and we didn’t go into the basement. I’ve been living in tornado-prone areas for 3/4 of my life and I can count the number of times I’ve actually taken shelter during tornado warnings on one hand. I have never in all that time seen one with my own eyes, and the last time we were having tornado warnings I was literally outside taking video on my phone because the clouds were cool.

I am not alone in this, mind you. This is a Midwestern thing. We are used to this shit– if anything, too used to this shit. By the time the warnings were really starting to show up, it was barely even raining at my house any longer, so we didn’t go anywhere.

So, uh, that building in that picture up there is maybe a five-minute drive from my house. It used to be a day care– not my son’s day care, but we’ve tried to get him in there a couple of times because it’s more convenient to where we live than anywhere else we’ve installed him. And it’s, uh, gone now, because tornado. Luckily said tornado was at 8:30 on a Sunday night so the building was deserted.

Maybe next time we’ll go hang out in the basement for five minutes.

Who won the pool?

If you had “day two of summer break” as your prediction for When Will Luther Collapse Into a Lifeless Puddle of Body Fluids, Trans Fats and Regret, you are a winner! Collect your prize on the way to literally anywhere else, because ain’t nothing going on over here right now.

New Face, 2019 edition

I have trouble believing that it has been over a year since the last time I embarrassed myself trying to find new glasses, but it has! And once again, I am bound and determined to find A New Look, even though all other available New Looks make me all itchy.

This was only the first place we went to, so it’s possible that none of these will be the choice, and it’s also still possible that I go with identical frames to the ones I have, because I do actually like my current frames. But what the hell! Let’s experiment! In ascending order of Radical Departure from My Current Face:

Nearly identical to my current glasses, but in blue. For whatever reason, I seem to have decided that gunmetal and/or black glasses don’t look right and so everything I liked enough to take a picture of ended up blue. The only real change here would be the color.

Also, no comments on my beard will be entertained. It was a stressful day.

A slightly subtler blue, and similar lens shape, but eschewing the completely frameless look I went with last year.

Brighter blue, bigger lenses than what I’m currently wearing, and continuing to be half frameless. I like the color of these the most but Bek didn’t like the shape of the lenses.

WHOA WHAT IS THIS MASSIVE RADICAL DEPARTURE WHO EVEN IS THAT DUDE

Still blue, though. It’s all about blue this year.

Feel free to vote, or comment, or whatever, if you like. Ultimately my wife probably gets the final call– she has to look at them more than I do– but I still wanna hear what y’all think.

Bonus picture of the boy, in frames I think I tried on but didn’t have the guts to be photographed in:

He doesn’t get a vote, but these were his favorites.

(Why are they all Oakleys? Good question. I tried on another dozen pairs other than these from a variety of other brands, but these guys seem to have my tastes dialed in, for whatever reason. I didn’t deliberately seek them out or anything like that.)