BALREMESH AND OTHER STORIES: Out July 5!!!!

mblile-72dpi-1500x2000…I am putting the finishing touches on Balremesh and other stories RIGHT NOW, and it’s out July 5th at Amazon.  I’ll link to the page once it’s up; preorders ought to be available pretty damn soon– like, probably by Tuesday or Wednesday.  Yep, that’s right.  New book!  In, like, TWO WEEKS!

(EDIT: I think it’s gonna be here; in the meantime, Amazon’s 404 pages are adorable.)

Why July 5th?  Because it’s my birthday.  So I assume y’all know what you’re going to get me.

Now, that said: an important thing you need to realize about this book is that nearly all of it is on this site, for free, right now.  Those of you who are regular blog readers may want to give this a pass, and that’s okay.  (Then again, it’s only 99 cents.  Raid your couch.)  The total wordcount is currently a noodge over 25K, and I expect that to go up a bit– there are a few other stories I’m considering including and haven’t decided 100% yet, but honestly the book is releasable as it stands.  I’m planning on using Balremesh as another nearly-risk-free way to get a sample of my writing without digging through my website, and when the print version comes (stand by) I’m going to price it as low as I possibly can without actually losing money on it.  Now, none of these stories have ever been available in an ebook before, and there are going to be a couple in there that aren’t on the site, so if you’re a regular reader you’ll get at least something new for your 99 cents.  But I don’t wanna mislead anybody: most of this is still out there.

What about Tales from the Benevolence Archives, you ask?  Stand by.  But I expect it out by the end of August, maybe early September– no later than that.  I’m done with all the stories but one, and my wife has started her editorial readthrough.  My artist is finalizing the digital cover and I’ll have him working on the print cover pretty damn soon.  It’s coming.

The drought is ending.

I promise.

And I think you’re gonna love what I’ve got planned next.

Call your Senators

Pure anecdata, and I just said this on Twitter but sometimes I like to say things in more than one place: I just called both of my Senators, one a Democrat and one a Republican, and told their staffers that I needed them both to vote against the Senate healthcare bill.  Also said to the Democrat’s staffer (who sounded exhausted) that I expected him to do literally everything in his power to oppose it.

I got through to the Democrat’s office on the first try.  It took four to get through to the Republican’s office.  And damn near every single response to this tweet by Todd Young is anti-AHCA.  It’s amazing:

There’s a lot of weasel words in there, but I’m choosing to take a bit of solace in the fact that it’s not a full-throated endorsement of the bill.

This bill will hurt literally every person living in this country.  Every single one.  Get on the phones, folks, and make your voices heard.  The DC Senate switchboard is (202) 224-3121, but I find more luck getting ahold of actual people by calling the local offices.

Blecccccccchhhhhhhhhh

middle-finger-poster-flag-6185-pI’m pretty much only posting because the thought of going three days without putting anything on the site gives me hives.  I don’t really have a ton to talk about, or at least I don’t have a ton of stuff I want to talk about.  I’ve spent most of the last couple of days wanting to punch the internet in the face because the internet is stupid and the people on the internet are stupid.  I’ve been protecting my sanity by unfollowing a ton of both-sidesers lately regardless of whether I think they’re generally entertaining when they’re not being both-sidesers.  I don’t have the patience for it any fucking longer, sorry.

On TV just now, Gordon Ramsay pronounced “guacamole” as “wocka-moll,” and now I want to punch him too because British or not that’s just not right.

Anyway.  An example: The world’s gotten stupid enough that I came very close to wading into a parenting argument on Twitter earlier today.  I won’t link to anything because I was too disgusted to make it through the video, but there’s a video floating around of a little kid cutting up in a restaurant.  He’s, I dunno, five, and he’s telling everyone to go fuck themselves and calling his mother and grandmother bitches and apparently at a few points he’s actually yelling Crip slogans.  There are motherfuckers who are sincerely suggesting that what this kid needs is more violence in his life because apparently Mom and Grandma don’t beat him enough.  How fucked up do you have to be to watch a kid that obviously damaged by violence and suggest that beatings are the way to help him?

I just can’t with any of it right now, sorry.