No reason

Another “I’m sick, no thoughts” night, and I found this, so I’m sharing it:

In which God has terrible aim

I could have written about Dolly Parton yesterday, but I wasn’t feeling well. I could have written about Tim Curry today, had Dolly not died yesterday. I don’t think I’m quite mentally or emotionally capable of processing the idea that we’ve lost both of them in 24 hours. Writing Jolene, all by itself, should have guaranteed Dolly immortality. Portraying Doctor Frank-N-Furter, all by … I’m going to go with themselves, should have guaranteed Tim Curry immortality, and for both of them I mean literal physical immortality, not the idea that people will still be enjoying their work in a hundred years, assuming we’re not all too busy scrabbling through a postapocalyptic, global warming-scarred wasteland.

They both should have had more time, damn it.

I knew immediately what picture of Curry to use, and had to look around for a moment to find that precise image. Dolly was a little more difficult until I decided to see what was out there of her and her goddaughter Miley Cyrus together, and the moment I saw that one … damn. Look at the love in that kid’s eyes. Yeah, yeah, I know, she’s an actress and a performer, blah blah blah, that’s the most genuine look I’ve ever seen on her face before.

(Because I want to hurt myself, I’m listening to Bowie right now.)

I saw a TikTok earlier from a creator I like quite a lot, and her suggestion was that we just need to cancel the rest of this entire week. Nobody goes to work or does anything. We just all need to be done for a few days, instead of doing what we’re all doing right now, which is falling prey to that human need to see everything in threes and wondering what new horror awaits us tomorrow. I’m still not feeling well, although I’m better than yesterday, and I’m going to bed super early again tonight. I cannot wake up to another disaster tomorrow, and I think if I get another text message from my wife during fourth or fifth hour I’m just going to toss my phone and my watch out the window and not read them. My students noticed when I got the text about Curry today. Do you know how strongly you have to react to something to get eighth graders to notice it? I wasn’t even teaching at the time; I must have made a noise or something, because ten seconds after I got the text I had six kids asking me if I was okay.

I’m not. I’m just not, and I need some time before the Next Fucking Thing happens, God damn it.

Nope. No way. Absolutely not.

Walked out of work feeling totally fine, and by the time I got home I had some sort of Sinus Thing going on and an alarming amount of pressure building up behind my left eye. Obviously it must be the last week of August. As I do not have time for this shit on a number of levels, I have shot both nostrils up with Afrin and I am going to bed exceptionally early. I’m going to nuke this thing in its Goddamned infancy and hope I can make it go away quickly.

no words only sleep

Came home, died in my chair, and then ate some pizza, and now in lieu of an actual post, please accept this picture of my new closet, complete with my clothes and the new motion-detecting lighting I’ve added. I thought for a minute that all my shit wasn’t going to fit, but that’s because I don’t understand how hangers work.

what the hell is this

If I look at this very, very carefully, I can pull some correct answers out of it. Like, there’s a 230 next to #1 up there. There’s a B106 next to #7, next to some arcane hieroglyphics of no known purpose. The ones in black pen are my handwriting, obviously. This kid brought this to me with the first four done, asked me if he was doing them right, and the marks on the page resembled no known words in any known language, so I walked him through the very straightforward lesson again and showed him what to do. This is what he turned in.

It is possible that the psychic damage I will take from trying to read this carefully will not be worth it. It is also possible that reading this will teach me spells.

Another thing I ran into with this assignment that I’ve not seen before is kids who absolutely cannot write exponents smaller and in the upper right of the number. As in they don’t have the fine motor skills necessary for it. It’s mind-blowing. We’re going to have to do a lot of written work this year just to get their handwriting to the point where it’s at what we used to think of as a first- or second-grade level. This is, remember, a fourteen-year-old’s work.

Giving these kids devices was the worst mistake the field of education has made during my lifetime. It’s worse than the overemphasis on standardized testing. This is a fucking disaster.

#REVIEW: The Keeper, by Tana French

I need someone to have a quiet word with Tana French. And maybe with her publishers. Hell, both.

The Keeper is the third and, supposedly, the final book in the Cal Hooper trilogy. I did a full review of the first book, The Searcher, and a reviewlet of the second, The Hunter. There is something great about this series, y’all, and I refuse to admit that it’s over in a fashion that rarely happens to me with series fiction. I absolutely insist on more books in this series, or at least that French starts a new series where she follows Trey as she moves on from Ardnakelty. It’s not like her Dublin Murder Squad series didn’t already establish a precedent for each book following a side character from the previous one. I love these characters and I love this setting, and God damn it, I’m not ready for or interested in this being over yet.

But let me back up, for the benefit of people who haven’t been reading this site since 2021 and don’t click on links: the Cal Hooper books follow, you guessed it, Cal Hooper, a retired Chicago cop who moves to Ireland on a whim in the first book and buys a fixer-upper in the tiny and fictional town of Ardnakelty. He quickly finds himself more or less adopted by a feral thirteen-year-old girl named Trey, and … well, he’s an ex-cop. It’s a Tana French book. There are shenanigans afoot. By the start of the third book, Cal is engaged to a local woman named Lena, Trey is seventeen and effectively Cal’s foster daughter, and Cal no longer feels like an outsider to Ardnakelty. In fact, the idea of not becoming part of Ardnakelty is a major theme in this book; Lena feels like Cal is growing too comfortable with the more pathological aspects of living in such a small town, and Trey, who was all about escaping Ardnakelty at her earliest possible opportunity at first, is contemplating leaving school for a carpentry apprenticeship and is tentatively exploring a relationship with a girlfriend.

And then a local girl, right around Trey’s age, is found drowned in a river, and the autopsy reveals antifreeze in her stomach, and we’re off to the races again.

Perhaps “off to the races” is the wrong phrase. This book is many things; in a hurry is none of them, and while it’s every bit as compelling a read as the previous two volumes, this one is even more about the three main characters and the culture of Ardnakelty than the first books were, and the plot is really an excuse to dive into their personalities and their relationships. There’s an intentionality about Cal’s relationship with Trey in particular that I, as someone with a couple of pseudo-adoptive kids of my own*, can really recognize and relate to, and Lena comes forward quite a bit more in this book than she has in the past.

Ardnakelty itself is much more of a character in this book than it has been in the past, too, and the way the book uses Rachel Holohan’s death to investigate themes of inheritance and change and destiny is really awesome. I’m not quite ready to call this French’s best book, something I also said about The Searcher, but it’s a tremendous piece of work and it really makes me want to reread the series from the start. If you’ve read the previous books you no doubt already have your eye on this one, but if you haven’t, at this point there’s no reason to wait.

(*) I don’t talk about them often, but I have two former students who call me Dad and mean it, and a handful who have tossed the word around a couple of times.

Oops

Came as close as I’ve come in a very long time tonight to just forgetting to post; I got home from work, took a nap more or less against my will and then ate some cereal and started putting my clothes back into the closet. It was only when my son stuck his head into our bedroom and announced that he was going to start getting ready for bed that I looked at my watch and realized what time it was.

I really, really hate daylight saving time. It doesn’t get dark in northern Indiana until after 9:00 even this late in the summer.

Anyway, having ensured my 888th day in a row of posting (no, really), I can go back now to … whatever the hell else I was going to do tonight. Or maybe just go to bed.

Organization!

Check out the new closet, y’all:

The right half is mine, since 95% of my clothes can be hung; the left half is my wife’s, who has more complex clothing needs. She is so excited about all the extra drawers, guys. Obviously we have a bit of trim work to do, that wasn’t covered by the scope of work with the closet people, and I think we might add some subtle lighting to the little gap between the top of the closet and the ceiling, but my week of all my clothes being on temporary racks in the living room is soon to come to a close. And doors! Doors that will close! Doors that will close, and hide my clothing from the outside word! Oh frabjous day, calloo, callay!