LOUISVILLE: View from my car window

Guess whose car got broken into last night? And has to listen to this for four hours on Sunday?

(Coulda been a lot worse. They took a pair of prescription sunglasses. That’s it. Didn’t touch any of my con stuff and the car didn’t flood in the rain.)

Aaight

Tomorrow I drive down to Louisville.

I’m at ConGlomeration Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.

Next week, all week, is state standardized testing at work and it’s going to be a madhouse.

Next Friday, Avengers: Endgame comes out.

The following Saturday and Sunday I’ll be at LaffyCon in Lafayette.

My goal for the next eleven days is to not die.

Let’s do this.

In which this is exactly what I’m talking about

I say it every time I talk about local elections in South Bend: the actual election is the Democratic primary, particularly with respect to the mayoral race, because the local Republican party absolutely refuses to run anyone with the remotest shred of credibility. In the last several years their candidates include demonstrably crazy people and at least one person who was homeless while running for office. They’ve run exactly one credible candidate since I moved back here in 2007 and he spent his entire race running against the city. Turns out if you think a place is a terrible shithole where no one should live, the voters who live there don’t choose you to run the place! I know, it’s weird.

Seriously, this was an actual mailing by those fuckers. Forgive me, it’s the highest-DPI scan I can find and it’s not great:

… yeah, that’s even worse than I thought. It reads: RIP: Here lies South Bend, a once vibrant city now abandoned by business, overrun by violent crime, and driving people from their family homes because of high property taxes.

Now, put me in charge of this awful place that I obviously hate!

Yeah, good luck.

Anyway, I talked about Republican candidate Sean Haas’ shitty website the last time I talked about the mayoral race around here. I am compelled to let everyone know that I have seen my first Sean Haas yard sign, and this motherfucker, who supposedly is a teacher, has no fucking clue whatsoever how capital letters work:

There are ten total and six unique words on that goddamned sign and two of them need capital letters and don’t have them. I dunno, maybe some of you out there think I’m being superficial, but this is a level of don’t-give-a-fuck that I would find shameful from a middle school student. I have both a former student and a former co-worker in common with Haas, although I’ve never met the guy, and while they both say they won’t vote for him neither of them think he’s a terrible person. So, fine, I won’t cast aspersions upon his ancestry or anything like that. But if your damn lawn sign has two typos and only ten words you do not get to be Mayor. I need people who give a shit in that job, and this guy clearly doesn’t, and furthermore he doesn’t have anyone working for him who gives a shit either or this abomination would never have made it out of Photoshop.

Or, y’know, Paint.

It was probably Paint.

So, yeah: when whoever wins the Democratic nomination wins 70-30 in the fall, this is why: it’s not because South Bend is so monolithically Democratic that a Dem win is inevitable– South Bend is in Indiana, after all– it’s because none of the local Republicans give enough of a shit to actually put up a nominee who is worth the money spent on his campaign.

(EDIT: I think I’ve decided who I’m voting for, by the way, but I think I’ll save it for another post and not step on this one. Needless to say, it won’t be Haas.)

Let’s start this week over

Been taking care of family stuff for the last couple of days, and between that and the fire at Notre Dame today I’m just really not in the mood for bloggery. I’d like to have my head on straight and my shit together before going into two straight weekends of conventions, so if anybody wants to invent time travel so that I can have the last couple of days back that would be super.

Instead, I’m probably gonna end up fighting with somebody on Twitter for a couple of hours. The hellsite has been hellsitier than usual today. Hooray!

In which I do author stuff

I will be in Louisville next weekend at ConGlomeration, held at the Crowne Plaza Hotel, also in Louisville. I have my usual table in Artist’s Alley– stand by for further information on that, as I don’t know exactly where I’ll be found yet– but I’m also doing four panels. From their programming page:

FRIDAY:

“Writing Compelling Dialog”
1pm | Perry
Ever wonder how writers manage that witty line or perfect turn of phrase as their characters mouth off to each other on the page? Join us to discuss the ins and outs of writing authentic and compelling dialog.

“Writing Compelling Characters”
2pm | Perry
From Doctor Who to Han Solo, to Spock, these fictional characters speak to us and move us, making their stories epic in a way that can’t be put into words. Come join us to discuss what makes a compelling character and how to write characters that will have your readers rooting for them long after they’ve put the book down.

SATURDAY:

“Success as an Indie Author”
1pm | Perry
Trying to make it as an independent author can be confusing and not a little frightening. Everything depends on you, and it’s up to you to make or break yourself in the field. Join some successful indie authors as they discuss ways to set yourself up for success and build your platform so that you can write stories you love and sell them to people who will love them just as much.

“Writing Fantasy”
8pm | Perry
Fantasy fiction has shaped our culture from ancient myths and fairy tales to current blockbusters and cult-followed classics. Join a panel of fantasy authors to discuss the elements of great fantasy writing and how to make your fantasy story the masterpiece it deserves to be.

I will leave it up to y’all to determine whether I deserve to be on any of these panels; the imposter syndrome is kicking in hard, I’ll admit, but fuck it I’m a teacher and I explain shit to people for a living and if I can’t BS my way through four independent hours of talking about writing … well, I absolutely can bullshit my way through four independent hours of talking about writing, is what I’m saying. I am assuming “Perry” is the name of the hall or the room they’re in, because surely they don’t have the same person moderating every writing panel. Again, more information will follow.

And then, the weekend after next, I’ll be at LaffyCon in Lafayette. This is a Saturday-Sunday only event, with no panels, although I might try and finagle my way into a podcast or something at some point.

After that, IndyPopCon in June, and then … well, I need to find some stuff to fill the summer up with, I think, because nothing else until Kokomo-Con X in October. Maybe I’ll do InConJunction again this year; it was the first one I ever went to so that might be fun. Plus it starts on my birthday.

Anyway, I’ve been designing new banners all day. They’re up on Patreon, even! And I ordered new books, and the point is I’ve spent an awful lot of money on being an author today, and you should go buy a couple of my books because Jesus is this shit expensive. But my new booth setup has potential to look super cool, and I’m excited about that.