SPRING BREAAzzzzzzzz …

I’m kind of surprised I’m not asleep already, if we’re being honest.

In which the magic almost happens

I have talked about my car a couple of times recently, so you may be aware that I drive a green Kia Soul. While I certainly didn’t mind the green, I bought the car used and the color was genuinely the least of my concerns; I like brightly-colored cars, which are less popular right now than they used to be, but the green Soul was inexplicably the most popular color and that was what was available, so that was what I got.

There is a name for the phenomenon I’m about to describe, and my former-psychology-major brain cannot quite produce it, but: you have no doubt noticed that once you, personally, own a certain kind of car you see that kind of car everywhere. And even knowing that, I was not quite prepared for just how many Alien Green Kia Souls there are on the road right now. In the years I’ve been driving the car I’ve been playing a little game with myself: how many Alien Green Kia Souls would I see at a given intersection at the same time? Would I ever actually pull up to a four-way stop and discover that there were Alien Green Kia Souls at all four of the stops?

Until today, my record was three of the four, and I genuinely thought I was never going to get past that. I mean … it’s a popular car, but that’s ridiculous, right?

Until today, when I almost achieved the unachievable. Because on the way home today I stopped at a four-way light, two lanes in every direction, and almost immediately noticed that I had tied my record– there were Alien Green Kia Souls both to my right and to my left. I looked at oncoming traffic, hoping to catch a glimpse of, perhaps, one in the distance approaching the intersection, so that I could count it before the lights changed and the two cars on the road I was crossing drove away.

And then it happened: a fourth Alien Green Kia Soul … pulled up in the lane next to me, driving the same direction I was.

Which I think counts as breaking the record, since this is in fact four cars at the same intersection for that brief moment until the other two started moving, but it does not in fact count for the magic situation I have been waiting for for so long, when there are four of us at each of the four cardinal directions.

And in my head, we always notice what has happened, and get out of our cars, and immediately become the best of friends.

But I guess now there are going to have to be five of us.

In which I’m still not gonna

We did not have a “fun movement activity” in our PD today; we did not, in fact, have a “movement activity” of any kind, although they are still threatening us with one on Thursday. And I got an email about a job through LinkedIn again, which is kind of exciting, although again I’m not certain it’s something I want to pursue. Apart from that … well, I survived another day on the long road to Spring Break and my family is home again, so all is well in Planet Siler at the moment, I suppose.

At the moment it’s 7:39 on Tuesday and I have no idea what I’m doing with Wednesday and Thursday, which is probably at least a minor problem. I still have a few kids who need to finish their testing, so class will be a little light over tomorrow at least, and I’m hoping a bunch of them stay home on Thursday. I told them today that for the e-learning day on Friday I intended to tell them to spend 45 minutes on this particular math program they don’t like to use, to a great chorus of moans, and then followed that up immediately by telling them that I did not plan to actually check to see whether any of them had ever done it. I think it’s kinda bullshit to make the Friday before Spring Break an e-learning day. I’m required to give them some work to do, but that doesn’t actually mean I need to grade it.

Is anybody out there into modern board games? I picked up the expansion/companion game to Gloomhaven at Target the other day for no good reason other than boredom, and while I don’t know who the hell I’d play a bunch of new board games with (the wife and child are getting roped into this one) I’m still curious if there’s anyone out there who has either played Gloomhaven or is into board games. Anybody have anything they want to talk about?

Not gonna do it

I absolutely refuse to have an opinion on the whole Will Smith/Chris Rock Oscars thing. I will say this, and this only: that every middle schooler in America yelled the words “Keep my wife’s name out your fucking mouth” in the hallway at least once today, and I could maybe have done without that. If you really need to hear my opinion on it, feel free to go on the Internet, find someone else’s opinion, and assign it to me. I hear that it’s not hard to find people talking about it.

ALSO! My wife and son are out of town. It is the boy’s Spring Break, and she took the week off so that someone was home with him, and they have popped off to Indianapolis for a quick overnight trip to see some friends. I suppose technically I was invited. In accordance with my new temporary bachelor state, I had Chipotle for dinner, bought incorrect lightbulbs at Target (I did not realize that “sunlight” not only meant “full spectrum of light” but also meant “installs two miniature suns in your office”) and I am also currently not wearing pants. I will play video games for three hours once I am done with this post and then get two hours of sleep. It’ll be super.

Let’s see, what else? I have survived the first of the necessary four days until my own Spring Break, which doesn’t really start on Friday, but since Friday is a day with no students it may as well. Tomorrow should also be survivable; I’m hoping for suspensions and/or injuries leading into Wednesday and Thursday.

I received this email from my boss toward the end of the day:

To provide a little bit of possibly-unnecessary context to this, this year the teachers’ day starts at 8:40 on Tuesday and Thursday instead of 9:20, which is when school actually starts. Those two extra 40-minute blocks are supposed to be used for professional development and team meetings. Now, keep in mind, all day Friday is supposed to be PD this week, and as of right now I don’t have the slightest idea what the hell they’re throwing at us. I will be skipping this event and daring anyone to say anything to me about it, because I do not recognize “fun movement activity” as a concept that exists and this is either an extraordinarily tone-deaf joke or an actual insult. I ain’t going. I suspect that “morale raising” is supposed to be the point of this; they can best support my morale at this point in the year by leaving me the hell alone. If anybody asks, I got to work late. Fire me.

And, on that note, I’m off to the Lands Between. Hopefully I’ll notice when it gets dark; this lamp is really out of control.


Four days to Spring Break.

Two of which I’ll be administering tests. Those days are easy. Boring, but easy.

I can do this.