In which I am supposed to be a tech person

This is my desktop setup:

You will note that TweetDeck is on the right, smaller monitor, and that Scrivener is on the left, larger monitor, which is also the actual computer. That’s how I want it.

Tweetdeck opens in the primary monitor nine times out of ten, and if there’s a pattern to that tenth time I can’t find the goddamn thing. Scrivener opens in the secondary monitor every single time.

I understand that this is very much a first world goddamn problem but it is driving me nuts. I assure you I have Googled the shit out of this and I cannot find a solution that actually works to getting those apps to open where I want them, so if one of you could Google it and post the first link, which will be something I have never seen before and will solve the problem immediately, I would appreciate it. This issue has clearly decided that it will not be resolved until I am at least moderately humiliated and fuck it at this point I’m fine with that.

(Note that any solution involving right-clicking on an app and going to “options” no longer works with Mojave.)

And because it’s probably relevant:

(I have no idea if anything nasty can be done with the serial number for my computer, but I figure let’s not take chances.)

Random Facebook PSA

I figured out something about Facebook, just a minute ago, that explains something that has been annoying me for months. I thought about sharing this on actual Facebook, but the blog post will get cross-posted there anyway so why not. Double blog day!

Anyway. Those of you who run Pages in addition to your personal site may have noticed something: Facebook helpfully informing you that your mom, or your wife, or someone else who you know good and goddamn well has Liked your page has commented on a post or something like that, and hey, wouldn’t it be great to invite those people to Like your page?

Well, sure, except they already do, and I know that, so please stop bothering me with this shit.

It’s one of those stupid things that gets on my nerves every once in a while– in other words, it’s everything about Facebook, an entire fucking ecosystem designed to do nothing but 1) allow me to have some small access to the lives of maybe literally five people who I’d completely fall out of touch with otherwise and 2) find endless ways to annoy me and/or utterly destroy society in the meanwhile.

I need to kill Luther’s Facebook page. This has been true for a while; my Clark Kent FB page has been gone for forever and is never coming back but those five people and the vague idea that the FB page drives traffic here has kept it around. I literally think about killing the page every day and don’t do it.

Anyway.

Here’s the thing I just figured out, since this wasn’t supposed to be an exclusively “bitch about Facebook” post: that list it’s drawing from, where it’s telling you to invite people to Like your page who have already Liked your page?

All of those people found your site on their own and were never invited to like it.

That’s why it’s repeating those names. It’s not comparing those people to the list of people who have Liked the page, it’s comparing them to a list of people who you have invited to Like the page. And if you never invited them because they are your wife and/or your mom and they did it right away when you first opened the page? Well, it’s gonna bug you about those people forever, as far as I know, because just because I understand why Facebook is doing the dumb and annoying thing it’s doing does not mean that the thing it’s doing is not still dumb and annoying, or that there’s any way to stop it from being dumb and annoying. It’s Facebook. Dumb and annoying are what it’s for.

But hey: at least I get it now. It’s stupid, but I get it. And so do you!

You may now go about your day.

Yikes

Photo by Jason Wagner.

Midwesterners are occasionally not very smart people.

I was starting to get ready to put the boy to bed last night when suddenly the civil defense alarms started going off. Normally the alarms don’t happen until after the National Weather Service has already kicked out some watches and warnings, and I hadn’t seen anything, so I posted a quick message to Facebook asking if anybody knew anything and we went about our business. It took maybe another 10 minutes for my phone to start blowing up, and even when it did, it was all “radar indicates rotation” type of stuff and no actual someone sees a tornado types of warnings. I feel like now that they’re doing “radar indicates rotation” as a threat level, we need a new word for that. Tornado warning always meant someone has actually seen a funnel cloud to me and I don’t know how seriously to treat your radar tornadoes.

Anyway, we didn’t go hide in the bathtub, and we didn’t go into the basement. I’ve been living in tornado-prone areas for 3/4 of my life and I can count the number of times I’ve actually taken shelter during tornado warnings on one hand. I have never in all that time seen one with my own eyes, and the last time we were having tornado warnings I was literally outside taking video on my phone because the clouds were cool.

I am not alone in this, mind you. This is a Midwestern thing. We are used to this shit– if anything, too used to this shit. By the time the warnings were really starting to show up, it was barely even raining at my house any longer, so we didn’t go anywhere.

So, uh, that building in that picture up there is maybe a five-minute drive from my house. It used to be a day care– not my son’s day care, but we’ve tried to get him in there a couple of times because it’s more convenient to where we live than anywhere else we’ve installed him. And it’s, uh, gone now, because tornado. Luckily said tornado was at 8:30 on a Sunday night so the building was deserted.

Maybe next time we’ll go hang out in the basement for five minutes.

Who won the pool?

If you had “day two of summer break” as your prediction for When Will Luther Collapse Into a Lifeless Puddle of Body Fluids, Trans Fats and Regret, you are a winner! Collect your prize on the way to literally anywhere else, because ain’t nothing going on over here right now.

In which I dress for success

I alluded a couple of weeks ago to a job opportunity that I was looking at that would have represented a substantial raise as well as a responsibility level more in-tune with my current career goals. I am proud to announce that, in keeping with being in week 7 or so of the worst month of my life, I was not even called for an interview for that job despite being literally the only person currently employed by my district who has done it.

I did have a job interview today, though, for my own fucking job, as in the job I have right now and I have been doing for a year. They slightly altered our job descriptions and cut a few of us and so everyone has to re-interview. I spent some time last night thinking carefully about what to wear to the interview, which I had deliberately scheduled for the last half hour of the school day so that I didn’t have to return to my building afterward.

My typical work uniform is a collared shirt, short-sleeved, with jeans and black shoes that pass for dress shoes at a casual glance but are not. I occasionally wear a tie, especially earlier in the year, and during the winter I frequently wear a sweater over the shirt. I despise long sleeves– something about the feeling of cloth on my forearms has always made me skeevy– and even if I’m wearing a dress shirt or a sweater the sleeves will be rolled up, meaning that I don’t often wear a sport jacket (or a blazer, or a suit coat, and frankly I don’t know what the hell the differences are between those things) because I’m not about to unroll my sleeves and struggle with cuffs just to put a jacket on.

Anyway, I ended up going with a dress shirt and a tie and jeans and slightly more formal shoes, because fuck it, I’m interviewing for a job I already have and if my clothes matter then my clothes don’t matter at all, if that makes any sense and just stare at it until it does if not.

I think the interview went okay, but hell if I know. The general rule lately is that if anything can go wrong it will, so I’m sure I fucked this all up somehow. There is one more day of school tomorrow and then a teacher work day and then I will relax for three days and then I’m gonna start writing a goddamn book. I got plans, dammit.

Oh, and when I got home I jumped in the pool for the first time. Which was fucking freezing. I’m not complaining. I’m in the right mood for freezing cold water, and I wasn’t in there for more than 20 minutes or so anyway. But man, it was nice.