A brief rant

Posted on by Luther M. Siler

ingredients-of-an-all-natural-egg1I apparently have yet to regain my jovial equanimity.

A request for the world’s dumb people and woo addicts:  If you have ever complained upon finding out that a “chemical”  (ooooh, SCARY!!!) that is part of one thing that you eat is also part of another thing that you do not eat, and said discovery caused you to consider no longer eating the first thing, or especially if you complained to others about the presence of the chemical in the edible thing… well, telling you to kill yourself is probably a little extreme and I’m not quite that far gone today but suggesting that you begin practicing the fine art of shutting the fuck up would be good, and perhaps also I should tell you some incredibly terrible things about oxygen that would totally ruin your day.  And hydrogen, which is in both water, which you need to survive, and gasoline, which you should never drink obviously is perfectly potable since water is.

Here’s a definition of “chemical substance,” you nimrods.  You don’t get to use that word again where I can hear or see you until you understand why complaining about things having “chemicals” in them is dead goddamn stupid.

Okay?  Good.

And because apparently I have decided to be in a bad mood today, I’m off to find a politician who has done something stupid.  Gimme five minutes.

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Luther M. Siler

Teacher, writer of words, and local curmudgeon. Enthusiastically profane. Occasionally hostile.

15 thoughts on “A brief rant”

  3. Reblogged this on Taylor Grace and commented:
    I had to reblog this one because it made me laugh out loud. It’s just hilarious. Man alive! I laughed so hard I scared my dog from her doggie dreams. How does he do it?
    “Give me five minutes”…Hee hee. I’m still laughing.

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  4. *giggle* Oxygen. AND hydrogen. Back in my day, university students would occasionally mess with their less-educated fellow students by starting yet another “Ban Dihydrogen Monoxide!” campaign on campus. And then laughing their asses off at people who panicked at a term that contained “monoxide,” so of course it must be BAD FOR YOU. (The stuff is so addictive that, once it’s in your system, withdrawal causes death!)

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  7. Ha! I had to send my husband (a former Chem E) to read this, too. He rants the same rant all the time. He likes to point out that the MSDS sheet for water was longer than that for various strong acids. (Prolonged immersion may lead to death!)

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