Perhaps the sound of a million baby-men all wailing at once alerted you; there is to be a new Doctor Who, or maybe a new Doctor, hell, I don’t watch the show, I don’t think “Doctor Who” is actually the character’s name, but maybe it is– and at any rate, the Doctor is to be played by a Person of Feminine Aspect, a Vagina-Haver, a Breasted-American, except she’s not American and Breasted-Brit sounds like some sort of snack food. A girl! Playing a character who used to be played by a man with a penis!
I assume Peter Capaldi has a penis. And all the others, whatever their names are. Steve or James or Bonbon or something else British. I’m only assuming they all had penises. I’ve never seen any of their penises. But apparently they were really important to all this Time Lord business.
So, yeah, there’s a girl in a show now and oh so many judgment-challenged sillymen are oh so very upset. And here’s the thing: I’ve kinda been jonesing for a new Nerd Thing lately that I could pay attention to? I’m tired of Walking Dead, and Game of Thrones has worn very very thin and I was never into the TV series anyway, and I’m not actually certain that the new Star Trek is actually watchable by regular people who don’t have some sort of arcane CBS subscription that I refuse to find out anything about. But I can watch this new Doctor Who thing, right? And knowing that me watching it is a tiny thorn in the ample sides of some very horrible people brings me pleasure, so there’s that.
I have actually tried to get into Doctor Who on a few occasions and failed. With the notable exception of Monty Python, British entertainment does tend to bounce off of me a bit, and every previous episode of the program I’ve tried to watch really didn’t get anywhere with me. But for some reason I downloaded the two-part season finale of Season 10, which was Capaldi’s final season (although I understand there’s some sort of Christmas special thing coming, where he’ll actually end his run?) and damn if I wasn’t well and hooked despite not really having the vaguest idea what the fuck was going on or who any of the non-Capaldi characters were. The Cybermen should have been Power Rangers-level cheesy nonsense but somehow they worked, and I was suitably creeped out by them.
And so: I shall be partaking of this new LadyWho person, and hopefully I will enjoy it. And if not, meh. At least I annoyed some idiots. That’s always worth something, right?
PS: Is “Dr. Who” some sort of faux pas? I keep wanting to spell it that way and changing it back to eliminate the abbreviation. Is it like Spider-Man, where if you don’t include the hyphen you die in seven days?