In which we need to have a talk, #Apple…

On By Luther M. SilerIn Geek, idiocy

First things first.  This is my desk:

IMG952015030995190718063Now, normally it doesn’t look like this, but I’m trying to make a point, and that is: it is extraordinarily difficult to be more of an Apple fanboy than I am.  I literally have one of every device Apple produces, and there are two iPads in that picture.  I have so many Apple devices, in fact, that I forgot one while taking the picture– although I wouldn’t have disconnected my Apple TV from my set in the living room anyway– and I currently can’t find my old clickwheel-style iPod.

This is my current watch:

Pebbleblack

The only difference here is I have a leather strap on mine, as the rubber one my initial Pebble came with broke in half a couple of weeks ago.

I do not want an Apple Watch.  Ordinarily (some of you will laugh at this, but I swear that I at least think it’s true) I do not believe my opinion to be a bellwether of broader reality, but I have to believe that if I don’t want an Apple Watch, then no one wants an Apple Watch.  I own every device that Apple produces and am at this exact second wearing a smartwatch, a device that I have on multiple occasions referred to as my favorite tech purchase since my original cell phone back in 1998-99 or so.  I am a white male with sufficient disposable income, a demonstrated interest in tech gadgets, and a distinct preference for Apple hardware.  There literally cannot be a more accurate picture of the target demographic for this item than I am.

And I have no interest in this thing.

It gets worse.  There are two watches in this picture.  I have preordered one of them.

php0wcxtwThe watch on the right is a Pebble Time Steel.  It will cost me $270 at the end of the month when the Kickstarter finishes and Pebble actually charges me.  It comes with a backup strap made of metal in addition to the leather one, and is made of stainless steel.  I’ll get it, if I remember right, at the end of June.  Maybe July, I’m not sure.  My current watch will be fine until it shows up.

The watch on the left is an Apple Watch Edition and it costs SEVENTEEN THOUSAND FUCKING DOLLARS.

I love you guys.  Truly.  I do.

But you are out of your fucking minds on this one.

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8 thoughts on “In which we need to have a talk, #Apple…”

  1. Goodness, at that price it is a steal, in that I would probably be on my way to jail on theft charges as that is the only way I could afford one. The Pebble does look very nice.

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  2. Out of curiosity: What have you found to be the benefit of having a smart watch? I’m not sure I would ever need one, but I once thought I wouldn’t need an iPhone and I’m now on my third.

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    1. There is a sort-of-review post here: https://infinitefreetime.com/2013/12/01/in-which-i-like-things/

      Long and short of it is, I turned the volume off on my phone the day I got the thing and haven’t turned it back on since. I also find waking up to a wrist vibration to be infinitely more pleasant than any alarm clock I’ve ever owned– granted, I do feel a little weird wearing a watch to bed, and had to train myself to do it, but I find the benefit massively outweighs the weird. I’m grown and have a job. I get to be weird if I want to now. 🙂

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  3. I am the female equivalent to you – I have every type of Apple product (except Apple TV because I don’t watch television). I do not already have a smart watch because I have been waiting on the Apple Watch. I will be pre-ordering mine on April 10 and trying to wait patiently to receive it. I will not, however, be order the Edition watch at $10,000 – I think I can settle for the sport edition at $349

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