Briefly

This thing I’m doing on Saturdays lately where I get up and spend the first two or three hours of the day reading is really working for me. I finished an entire book cover-to-cover this morning. I don’t know if you’ve noticed this about me, but I like books.

Also, I finally gave up and went to the doctor last night after work, only to be told that my suspicion that my cold had morphed into a sinus infection was probably correct, but that said sinus infection was almost certainly viral and so there really wasn’t anything to be done other than wait it out and drink something called “throat coat” tea, which strikes me as a weirdly pornographic name for a beverage.

Today, I feel shittier than I have in the last several days. We’re up to two weeks and some change now, I think, and I’m heartily tired of this.

The end.

In which we build, ctd.

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Something happened today that, somehow, hasn’t happened yet, despite the fact that the boy is in first grade: he woke up feeling sick, and I decided to call in myself and keep him home for the day.  By noon my plan had been shown to be less than wise; a headache so bad that it had him swaying in the morning had given way to, well, nothing, and I’m finding myself fighting off a slightly delayed case of con crud.  I think it’ll run its course today and be done tomorrow, but I’m definitely low on spoons, if you know what I mean.

We spent the morning in Minecraft again, and I added a floating cabin, complete with waterfall and a manmade lake underneath, plus the totally-made-up flaming magic rocks that help it float– the floor in the house is actually made of glass covered in carpet because glass won’t burn and nothing else I was putting down was keeping the fires from getting through.  All of this is across the river from yesterday’s efforts.

In the background there is another floating fountain made of emerald.  Yes, there’s apparently a theme in this world; much like IT, everything floats down here.

Less mangled children, though, I suppose.

I’ll try and write something that isn’t about Minecraft tomorrow.  If nothing else, I have a book review or two to write.

In which we build

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I had plans for a post tonight, but instead the boy declared it was going to be Minecraft Night, so we each sprawled on the couch with an iPad in hand and made stuff.  I decided to go with an elemental shrine theme, building a pool with an infinite waterfall, a fire shrine, a nature garden (which was as close to “earth” as I could come up with) and a glass house in the sky only reachable by flying but providing an awesome double-slime-diving-board down to the lake below.

The boy only went with one element, shamelessly stealing my glass sky house idea, but then did it twelve thousand times as interesting as mine, so I think he wins.

So yeah.  I didn’t manage much of a post but I think I spent my evening pretty damn well.

On priorities

flat,1000x1000,075,f.jpgLet’s have a word, parents and grandparents.

It doesn’t really matter if your (maybe) four-year-old grandson is any good at Skee-Ball or Big Rig.  You hear me?  It doesn’t fucking matter at all.  Yes, I know if he’s more accurate he’ll get more tickets and be able to get more stuff from the redemption counter afterwards.  So is he, believe it or not.  And it doesn’t matter.  

He’s not going to care afterwards.  He’s not improving his motor functions when you stand behind him and browbeat him for fifteen minutes about keeping his elbow locked or his arm straight when he’s throwing a ball for Skee-Ball.  His timing isn’t going to be any better if the two of you stand behind him and shout NOW! (notably, not in unison) when you think he ought to be dropping a coin to hit a lever in Big Rig.  And if you, a grown-ass man old enough to have Seen some Shit in your life, who presumably raised some kids to adulthood already, elbow your four-year-old out of the way on this meaningless fucking game so that you can “do it right for him,” there is something seriously wrong with you.  

I mean, hell, you’ve made me hate you in less than half an hour, and I’m not the target of your constant hectoring and your bullshit over every single damn thing I do.  No wonder the kid’s “misbehaving” (by refusing to give up his last ball on his Skee-ball game as the timer slowly clicks the throw away anyway, because he doesn’t want you to do it for him); it’s not “kids these days,” as you griped to the other mysteriously old couple in my gameroom just now.  It’s that you’re both assholes and your grandson rightly doesn’t seem to like you very much, because he’s not having any fun.  

You have managed to take a kid to an arcade and make it not fun.  That’s unbelievable.  It would be an accomplishment to be proud of were it not so sad.

I mean, seriously: why the hell did you bring him here anyway?

On America’s pasttime

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This post will be of even less interest to the majority of you than usual, mostly because the vast majority of you aren’t local, but: I attended a AAA South Bend Cubs game at our local baseball parky-thingy Saturday night.  The stadium has been there a long time, but I probably haven’t been to a game since high school.  I remember enjoying the several games I went to, but “several” is probably the right word.  And since college I have almost completely abandoned watching sports as a means of recreation.  I know more than I pretend to a lot of the time but I literally can’t name a single currently working pro NFL or MLB player, probably not more than half a dozen NBA players, and not a single college athlete in any sport.

But anyway.  There’s something about baseball stadiums, right?  And I’ve never gotten to be in a skybox before, so being right behind home plate and in a spot where it was highly unlikely that I’d be hit by a fast-moving projectile was kinda cool.  Plus, hey, cash bar that served free soft drinks and free catering.  It was also a cool Dad Night, as my son knows nothing of baseball and had never been to a game, and I bought him a lightsaber to play with.  He had fun too.

Local folks, if you haven’t found an excuse to see a game at Four Winds Field lately, go.  Tickets are cheap and the experience is generally excellent, especially if you’re able to go on a night where there are fireworks.  Just sit along the third base line so you can see them better.  There are grassy fields to sit on in the outfield and bouncy houses for the littler kids and the usual concessions and all that other fun stuff.  If you’re around, go.  Even if you’re not into baseball, it’s a great way to spend a Saturday night.


Ran into a Trump supporter at work today, the first openly so individual I’ve actually encountered.  I had to eventually stare him down and tell him that I didn’t discuss politics at work, and his wife clearly has grown to loathe him and his need to insert politics and crazypants into every conversation with every stranger he meets.  I felt bad for her.  He probably needs a therapist.

In other words, pretty much exactly who I thought he’d be.

Shall we play a game?

300px-WOPR_test.pngFor some reason I’ve been fiddling with this in my head for the last few days: what would the American presidency have looked like if the 22nd Amendment had never passed?  (The 22nd amendment was the one limiting presidencies to two terms, passed because FDR decided he was cool enough for four.)

Now, obviously, there’s a lot of butterfly-effect stuff that might have happened with this, and most of that I’ve ignored, although it might be fun to play with later.  The main rule I’m working with is that people who were interested in the presidency stay interested in the presidency.  So, for example, you can imagine that different Presidents might have altered our Vietnam policy from what it was, and that if our Vietnam policy is different, perhaps John McCain is never shot down and imprisoned for five and a half years, or perhaps whoever is in office intensifies the war and McCain never even makes it out.  For the purposes of this conversation, McCain survives the war and is still interested in being President during the years he ran.  If you want to play along and go into more detail, feel free, but that’s where I’m coming from.

So.  That in mind, here we go:

All elections before 1952 are unchanged, because there was nothing preventing Presidents from running for a third term– and, in fact, both the Roosevelts did— only the tradition that no one should serve longer than Washington did.

1952 election:  This actually remains unchanged.  Truman was grandfathered in by the 22nd Amendment and could have run again had he wanted to, but he lost the New Hampshire primary to Estes Kefauver and dropped out quickly.  Dwight Eisenhower becomes President.

1956 election:  Eisenhower demolishes Adlai Stevenson, and is elected to his second term.  No change.

1960 election: Still able to run, and not much trusting his Vice-President, Eisenhower runs against a young Senator named John F. Kennedy.  In the actual election, Kennedy only barely squeaked by an unsupported Richard Nixon and may only have won by cheating in Chicago.  In my alternate universe, Eisenhower easily wins a third term.

1964 election: Real-world Eisenhower started having major health issues in 1965.  In my world, after the stresses of a third term, those health problems manifest a bit earlier and Eisenhower declines to run for a fourth term in office.  The 1964 election is therefore Nixon vs. Kennedy again, and Kennedy wins.

Note that because Kennedy was not President in 1963, he’s still alive in this scenario.  I’m choosing to decide that Oswald would not have shot Eisenhower.  Kennedy was in Dallas on a campaign stop, after all; Ike may as well have gone elsewhere.

1968 election:  Kennedy easily defeats Barry Goldwater and wins a second term.

1972 election: Running against Richard Nixon again, Kennedy wins a third term in office.  In 1973 his Vice-President Lyndon B. Johnson passes away from a massive heart attack (NOTE: this actually happened) and Senator Stuart Symington of Missouri, JFK’s original pick for the Vice-Presidency, is named to fill the role.

1976 election: Finally unable to deny his health issues any longer, JFK declines to run for a fourth term.  Sitting Vice-President Stuart Symington is unable to defeat former Georgia governor Jimmy Carter in the Democratic primary, but California governor Ronald Reagan wins the election.

1980 election:  Reagan defeats Carter again.

1984 election: Reagan makes a thin paste of Walter Mondale and spreads it on his toast for breakfast, winning 49 states and beginning his third term.  (NOTE: You could make a good argument that Mondale, having never been Carter’s VP, would not be the nominee in 1984.  I would contend that Reagan loses to no one in 1984 so the name of the punching bag is irrelevant.)

1988 election:  Reagan becomes the third three-term President in a row to decline to run for a fourth term.  We all know his Alzheimer’s was starting to kick in in 1998 anyway, and now he’s at the end of three terms, not just two, so it probably would have been worse.  Gerald Ford, his VP, runs against Massachusetts governor Michael Dukakis and easily wins election.

(Why Ford?  Because George HW Bush’s career becomes mightily murky if Nixon is never President.  He had just lost an election for the Senate when Nixon appointed him ambassador to the UN in 1971, and didn’t hold elected office again until being elected Vice-President with Reagan in 1980.  Without Nixon in the White House, he never runs for Senate (it was Nixon’s idea) so maybe he’s still in the House or still in the Senate and maybe he would have run; it’s hard to say.  This is another place where folk can argue.)

1992 election: Ford, not actually a very good President, is defeated by Bill Clinton, serving the same single term he’d served anyway, just not in the same years.

1996 election: Clinton defeats Bob Dole for a second term.

2000 election:  Clinton runs against George W. Bush, the former Governor of Texas.  Now, in the real world, Al Gore won the popular vote and lost the electoral college, at least partially because of his incomprehensible choice to run away from Clinton’s accomplishments as President.  Clinton himself, a much savvier politician with sky-high approval ratings (68% in 2000) and unlikely to run away from his own record, easily defeats Shrub for a third term.

2004 election: Clinton bucks the tradition set by the previous three three-term presidents and chooses to run for a fourth term, because, really, Clinton would have to be dead to decide not to run for office.  However!  After 12 years of Clinton scandals, the nation has decided it would rather shoot itself in the face than ever hear the word “Whitewater” again, and a popular maverick politician by the name of John McCain narrowly defeats Clinton in the 2004 election.

(I can hear you: whaaaat?  I put it to you that GWBush destroyed John McCain, and McCain was actually a fairly popular politician on a bipartisan level before, specifically, the 2000 South Carolina primary.  The shame of having had to endorse the guy who used his own daughter against him in South Carolina broke something in him.  I think this is at least arguably possible.  And if not, well: fight me!  That’s what this is for.  🙂  )

And, at any rate, it doesn’t matter much anyway, because:

2008 election:  Barack Obama defeats McCain anyway, stopping him after a single term in office.  (And this is fuzzy too, though, right?  If Clinton is still in office, does 9/11 happen?  Do we go to war in Iraq?  Obama used the war as a cudgel against both Clinton and McCain.  Absent that war, potentially, what happens?  Or does McCain start a different war in between 2004-2008?)

2012 election:  Barack Obama wins a second term, defeating Mitt Romney.

2016 election: Barack Obama wins 48 states against any of these yahoos, for the easiest third term since Reagan.

 

So.  What did I get wrong?  Let’s argue!

In which I am content

unnamedI admit it: I’m feeling slightly guilty right now about the fact that I’m not going to work again this week.  The note from my doctor specifically said that I was not to return to school before November 2nd, and the main reason was that we wanted to check on the new medication.  Well, so far, the new medication’s been fine, although I can come up with at least one example in the last couple of weeks where I was fine one day and emphatically Not Fine for several days after that.  Point is, I’m following orders.

I’d be off today anyway, though, because for the first time we have a fall break, and today is the last day of that fall break.  As it turns out, the preschoolers at Hogwarts (have I mentioned this?  From now on, my kid’s school is Hogwarts) had a field trip today, and they went to a farm in southern Michigan– here, specifically.  They put out a general call for chaperones last week and since I didn’t really have anything else I needed to be doing today (again, I’d have been off of work anyway) I decided to tag along.  And… well, it was a hell of a lot of fun, actually.  There’s perfect October weather outside.  We went on a hayride and explored the farm and picked and ate apples and grapes right off the tree (or vine, as the case happened to be) and the boy got a pumpkin to bring home with him.  There are now four pumpkins in the house; I probably ought to get thinking about what I’m going to do when I carve mine, because I wanna do something fun and creative and having an idea of some sort would probably help with that goal.


Speaking of perfect October weather, I was lucky enough last night to get a gorgeous one-day-before-full moon and a completely cloudless sky, so I hauled out the telescope.  I need to get an attachment to make taking pictures easier, but I did manage this one:

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Searching for Malumba is out tomorrow!  I’ve officially hit my goal for pre-orders, but if you want to make me even happier, it’s available in print and digitally here.  Expect more about that tonight.  🙂

Holy whoa

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