So my problem in life right now is that I really really need to find a new job but I am also a lazy human and I have a job, and searching for jobs is hard so I don’t wanna. I’ve caught myself thinking several times lately that being back in the classroom next year wouldn’t be so bad. I can allow myself to think things like this only so long as I’m able to pretend that “teaching” actually involves helping kids to know things, which is the smallest and frankly one of the least important parts of the job.
Have a story: Today I bought coffee on my way to work. I drank the coffee when I arrived at work. Approximately half an hour later, I had to poop, so I did.
That story is going to be impossible if I’m teaching next year, because teaching is a job where grown adults with Master’s degrees can’t go to the bathroom when they need to.
Here’s a story: Today someone else was sick and it didn’t affect how I did my job at all.
Only that story’s pretty close to impossible too, because the district’s policy for substitute teachers is so stupid and destructive that no one wants to sub anymore (and it’s a terrible job even under better conditions; we all know this) and so frequently if your partner teacher is sick you just have to shrug and have 65 kids in your room all day. And if you kill any of them it’s your fault.
I cannot and I will not.
Here’s a story: I had a Sunday.
I’ll never have a Sunday again if I go back to teaching. Sunday’s Grading Day.
I’m no more than three or four days away from being done with work until August or so. I need the break if for no better reason than Starlight is pushing on my skullbones trying to get out and I need a couple of weeks to get it started. And I gotta take this “new job” shit seriously and start looking. Because this ish ain’t gonna drop in my lap.