Was this image specifically engineered to make me insane? Is this what we’re fucking doing now?

SIN NUMBER ONE: This is a seriously fucking milquetoast quote and it doesn’t need to be framed as a quote in the first place. It’s not bad as a sentiment! Throw it on the rainbow background and call it good!

SIN NUMBER TWO: If you’re going to phrase something as a fucking quote than take the ten seconds it takes to Google it and figure out who the shit said the damn thing in the first place. Don’t ever fucking put “unknown” as the source for a quote. It makes you look like an asshole. And if you’re going to insist on putting “unknown” as the source for your fucking quote…

SIN NUMBER THREE: fucking spell “unknown” right.


In which the autogaslighting continues

This is not my district, but it’s nearby, and I’m looking at this and reading it and genuinely doubting my own sanity, because I cannot for the life of me imagine why the fuck anyone would ever think any of this is a good idea.

Yesterday was the first day that Indiana had over 5000 new coronavirus cases. There were 5038. Today– and “today,” to make sure everyone understands, is a word that means “one day after yesterday,”– there were over 6500. School districts across northern Indiana and southern Michigan are going back to full-time virtual or dialing back on the plans they had in place, and this is what Mishawaka thinks is a good idea once 2nd semester starts? Not only are they dumping all of their grade-cohort kids into the building at the same time, thus doubling the number of students in every single class they’re in, thus fucking up any actual chance at social distancing in hallways, classrooms, or at lunch, but by shifting to grade-only cohorts they’re guaranteeing that lots and lots of families with more than one child are sending those kids to school on different days.

Like fucking hell the Board of Health okayed that. I don’t believe that for a second. And they actually talk about how they already don’t have the staff to keep the buildings open! Do you think this shit is going to get better come January? You want people to be more vigilant, but you’re making the situation in your buildings worse on purpose???

And they don’t get into this in the letter, but if you were to click through and look at some of their individual school plans, you’d find out that they’re tying whether you can be 100% virtual to grades and attendance. In other words, they think that if your grades are poor they can require you to come to school part time.

Utter fucking madness. It’s either them or me. Someone is completely crazy. I just wish I could be certain who it was, because more and more I find myself living in a world where I have to conclude that huge numbers of the people around me are out of their Goddamned minds, and eventually it’s going to get to the point where it has to be me and not them.


THREE day WEEK end (clap, clap, clapclapclap)

Pretty sure I’ve used that as a title for a blog post in the past, but whatever.

It was a really long fucking week, and not an especially good one, either professionally or mentally. My principal (who I really like, for the record) sent out a couple of emails at the end of the day regarding some walkthroughs that are going to be conducted next week and some expectations for how instruction should be going, and I read them and reflected on how I had to keep a seventh grader after class earlier today to make sure that he understood that if you have six pencils and you want seven you need one more.

That is not a joke, and the kid wasn’t fucking with me. At one point I literally put six Post-Its on the table in front of him and counted them and asked him how many more he needed to get seven. He said one instantly.

“Okay, what if they were pencils? If you have six pencils and you want seven, how many more do you need?”



This has not been a week where I’ve been able to feel confident about my skills as an educator, let me put it that way. I have three days to get my head back on straight; I’m not sure that’s going to be enough time, and after several months of thinking yeah, it would be okay if I ended up doing this same job again next year, I’m very much in the mode of thinking that a night job at 7-11 might be a better use of my skills right now.

I’m not talking to anyone under twenty who I wasn’t personally responsible for the birth of for at least 48 hours. Hopefully that will improve things.

On home remedies

220px-L-Ascorbic_acid.svg.pngDamn near every single human being I work with has lost at least a few days out of the last few weeks to some disease or another.  So far I’m the only one who has remained immune.  So naturally it just turns out that it looks like I’m just last.

Which is in keeping with my sales, but that’s beside the point.

Anyway, I’m going to bed insanely early tonight and mainlining a ton of Vitamin C in hopes of knocking this shit out before it has a chance to set in.  I’m juuuust at the beginning of a cold right now so I’m crossing my fingers that such a thing is actually possible.

What’re the best cold-prevention tips you have?  The more outlandish the better.  If your grandmother used to make you drink some crazy shit that smelled like it was made of durian and bat piss I totally want to hear about it.


For those of you who have followed previous blogs of mine during presidential campaigns: I will not only not be liveblogging tonight’s disaster, I will be as far away from it as I can.

My apologies to the three of you who were hoping I had a stroke halfway through.

More later.