Wait no

I said it was the first day of spring last week? That was wrong. Today was the first day of spring, and the way I can tell was the fact that half the building was pissed off and the other half was crying today. All of my ability to can has been replaced with cannot. I still haven’t finished that Lego set so I think I’m gonna go do that, for real this time. Maybe go to bed early. Really early.

In which multiple things are true at once

The first True Thing is that, even making the inevitable corrections for First Day of School, I am of the tentative opinion that I’m in for a reasonably good year of school. Things can always change and my fourth hour is going to be a challenge, I think, but I had a half-dozen boys in particular who I was concerned were going to end up being shitheads and who at least right now appear to be interested in staying on my good side. But my advisory shows every sign of being delightful and my Algebra class looks pretty damn good too, so I’ll take what I’ve got.

The second True Thing is that dinner was a handful of Saltines, a bunch of grapes and five or six slices of deli chicken because the notion of creating anything more complicated was well beyond me.

The third is that I am tired in every organ and muscle and pore of my body, and I’m going to bed early tonight, because somehow I have to do this again tomorrow? How does that even work?

(I did not, by the way, get that geometry class that I was angling for all summer– did I ever actually say that? I can’t get pissed about it. The chance that I was going to get lucky enough to get paid for a class with six kids in it was never high. I have an overload again anyway, though, because we only have three math teachers and that is absolutely Not Enough Math Teachers.)

13

That’s how many office referrals I wrote today. Ten in one class. Ten, in one class, before I could even get class started.

I may take tomorrow off.

I may also shut down my YouTube channel, but that’s a whole other conversation. I’ve been realizing more and more lately that it’s not fun any longer, but that might just be general depression and anhedonia, and maybe I shouldn’t delete 500 videos until I figure out which it is.