Tag: 2024

At least there’s meth?

On By Luther M. SilerIn Politics4 Comments

I couldn’t pass this up.

Compulsive masturbator and God-botherer Mike Johnson is, according to this brief but hilarious CNN article, having trouble convincing fellow Republicans to come to the House GOP retreat scheduled for next Wednesday and Thursday. Part of the problem, apparently, is that Johnson, who is so addicted to porn that he and his son share an app so that they can monitor each other’s special dinkie times, has booked a deliberately “family-friendly” resort in West Virginia for the retreat. The article does not explicitly say that the House members are pissed because they prefer their hookers to have more teeth than facial sores, but it comes awfully close for something from the mainstream media.

In which I skipped Super Tuesday

On By Luther M. SilerIn PoliticsLeave a comment

I have paid less attention to this election, at least in writing, than any election since probably Bush/Gore. The reasons are probably pretty obvious; first, that the outcome is more or less predetermined no matter what foolish children on TikTok or Dean Phillips think and second, I don’t enjoy the existential horror that rears up every time I contemplate the idea of the Beast getting a second crack at the White House. It doesn’t help that I’m holding firm to my stance that I Know Nothing About Politics, and it also doesn’t help that the polls seem to be pretty clearly saying one thing, and every other aspect of reality appears to be saying another thing, and those two things are not the same.

(Almost starts a rant, aborts)

Anyway. Today was an e-learning/meetings day, and tomorrow and Friday both ought to be pretty calm. Ought to; we’ll see, as e-learning days can really screw up the rhythm of the week and it’s entirely possible that I’m going to get a loud and annoying Monday-Tuesday cycle (Tuesday is reliably the worst behavior day of the week) for the second time this week instead of the usually more sedate and chill Thursday-Friday. We’ll see what happens, I suppose.

Go home, Indiana, you’re drunk

On By Luther M. SilerIn idiocy3 Comments

You may recall– it has only been a couple of days, after all– that it was blazingly hot in my classroom all week, and that I actually wore shorts to work one day this week.

I woke up this morning and was greeted with this:

A lot of that has melted off already, but from what I’m seeing in the weather forecast we are due for 68 degrees on Tuesday and then at least a chance of additional snow on Wednesday. I don’t know who the hell was responsible for proofreading 2024 but someone deserves a Goddamn refund.

A reminder that I know nothing

On By Luther M. SilerIn Politics1 Comment

New Hampshire’s happening tonight, and as of this moment there’s about 11% of the vote in on the Republican side and the shitgibbon is ahead, by a fairly paltry amount. I have no sense whatsoever of where in New Hampshire Nikki Haley might be expecting her votes to come from, so trying to drill down at all doesn’t make any sense, and it’s probably a good time to remind everyone that I don’t know anything at all about politics or how people think, because I still don’t understand how this illiterate, atheist con man got the Republican nomination the first time, much less what’s looking like the third. 

(EDIT: The AP called the race while I was writing this; at this point, I really feel like all we have left is to hope the fucker dies before the election. Preferably as soon as possible. Tonight would be cool. God’s in the bathroom again, apparently.)*

Meanwhile, Biden– who is not on the ballot– is pulling 74% of the vote against Phillips and Williamson. If this isn’t enough to convince a certain slice of what ought to be the Democratic electorate that there is not actually any desire on the part of actual voting Democrats for any other candidate, I don’t know what the hell could do it. I suspect these people, much like the shitgibbon’s cultists, are similarly impervious to reason, but we’ll see.

(SECOND EDIT: While I was writing the first edit, the AP called the race for Biden, too. Which is deeply fucking hilarious. Time for Phillips and Williamson to go.)

Meanwhile: snow day today, and freezing rain is being replaced by Hell Fog, and I’m fully anticipating a two-hour delay tomorrow, because quarter-mile visibilities and kids walking to school don’t mix. There won’t be a close, but my district has had Fog Days in the past, and two-hour delays don’t count against us the way actual closures do. This might bite me in the ass if I have to go in and plan a day on no notice, but … yeah, I’ll risk it. 

* I do actually think Biden can and will beat him again, but I’d prefer to not have to find out if I’m right about that. The fucker exists on cheeseburgers and his brain is made of pudding. Come on, God.

On last year and next year

On By Luther M. SilerIn life3 Comments

I went back and looked at the post I wrote at the end of 2022, and while I was willing to admit that 2022 had been a good year, I was clearly feeling pretty gun-shy about the idea. The notion that after the utter carnage that 2016 through 2021 had been, an actual good year had finally happened really seemed to beggar belief. I can’t justify any such hesitation about 2023; last year was a good year by nearly all personal metrics other than my own health, and even that wasn’t all that bad. In a lot of ways, I really don’t have anything to complain about, and I’m tantalizingly close to a major, major milestone in my life, one that ten years ago I didn’t think was ever going to happen: assuming no disasters occur (hah!), I am on track to be completely debt-free other than my house by the end of this school year. That’s entirely due to trends that started in 2022 and accelerated in 2023.

(I just took a few minutes to look, and I was officially diagnosed with sleep apnea in November of 2022, so that’s not 2023’s fault. I can’t even get mad at 2023 about that.)

Here’s the thing, though: 2024 fucking terrifies me. Like, bone-deep. Like, I don’t know how you diagnose someone with anxiety when the world is actually like this terrified. Why? Notice how I said “personal metric” up there? By that I mean, like, my life, my health, my family, my job, my finances. That sort of stuff. That’s all good right now, although I know how fast shit can change. Anything other than that? Fucked. Fucked. This was the hottest year in the history of humanity and nothing’s going to change. I have brought a child into this bullshit and he has to somehow survive for several decades after I’m gone while the world is busy being on fire. Israel is committing genocide in plain fucking sight of the entire world and no one is doing anything about it and there is literally nothing I can do to change anything about it. There’s a fucking presidential election this year. The state legislature is about to go back into session and who the fuck only knows what sort of bullshit they’re going to put on us this year.

(The pronoun bill? Sorta fizzled. Everybody just sort of mutually decided that we weren’t going to pay any attention to it, and nothing happened. I violate the pronoun law a hundred times a day and nothing is going to happen to me.).

I genuinely don’t know how I’m going to survive ten fucking months until the election. And the level of panic that sets in any time I try to seriously contemplate what I should do if things don’t go our way is indescribable. 

So. Yeah. Last year was the last good year. Even if we win 400 electoral votes this fall I still have to make it to November before that happens. I just don’t see anything coming this year that I can look forward to, other than that whole “no debt” thing, which isn’t going to work out for me all that well when I have to sell everything and move to Canada on no notice. Or, y’know, not, since the fascists taking over could pretty much result in anything. Who the fuck knows.

Also, so far it’s been 2024 for two days, and I was woozy and sickish all day yesterday– I have never been hung over even once in my entire life, but based on how people have described it to me, I may as well have been– and last night I managed to throw out my back in my sleep because I’m 47 and that shit can happen now. So, yeah, fuck this year.

Anybody have the number for a good therapist? Maybe that’s where all my money can go.

On the imminent death of my TikTok account

On By Luther M. SilerIn idiocy2 Comments

This is not the first time I have had to address this nonsense in this space, so you’d think the whole fucking world would be aware of this and not make the same mistakes again, but God damn it, people, former presidents and particularly active presidents do not typically attend the funerals of First Ladies. They just don’t. That’s it. Biden, in fact, in attending Rosalynn Carter’s memorial service this week, was the first sitting president to attend the funeral of a First Lady since Kennedy.

I don’t care if you like it or not, it’s fucking protocol. It’s how this works. Quit bitching when you don’t see whatever president at a First Lady’s funeral. I’m fuckin’ tired of it.

You will note that every living real First Lady and that classless Eurotrash participation-trophy wife from the last administration were all in attendance, even though literally no human being alive or dead wanted Melania or her fucking grey coat there.

Anyway. I’m fucking tired of TikTok and it’s bullshit stupid people with their bullshit stupid opinions, because since I’m no longer on Twitter TikTok is now the place where I’m most likely to encounter that type of thing. And I can’t fucking take it any longer. I am really and truly going to have a fucking rage stroke before the election if I don’t do something to shield myself from internet stupid, and that’s going to mean TikTok has to go, which would make this my only active social media account remaining, and I’m in complete control of who gets to talk here.

I’d do it right now except that, again, in the absence of Twitter, TikTok is where I do most of my book discovery now, and I genuinely don’t know where I’d go to hear people talking about books without it. If you have suggestions, let me know, because if I don’t find a way to reduce my stress and blood pressure I’m going to have to exercise, and we all know that’s a fucking terrible idea.

Sure, that’ll be easy

On By Luther M. SilerIn lifeLeave a comment

Another postlet tonight, as I had a meeting this evening regarding a literally once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for my son and I. Only thing is I have to talk my wife into it and then find $12,000.

No problem.

On Ron DeSantis

On By Luther M. SilerIn Politics2 Comments

If he decides to run for President in 2024, he’s an utter fucking idiot.

I’m at my aunt’s house overnight, and CNN or MSNBC has been on for literally every second I’ve been in the house, so I’ve watched more TV in the last six hours than in the last six weeks. And there’s been a lot of chatter about the coming civil war in the Republican Party between the shitgibbon and Ron DeSantis.

DeSantis is— holy shit— only 44 years old, and he’s a moron if he runs in 2024. Why? Because assuming he hasn’t had the stroke or heart attack that he so richly deserves or been locked in jail until he dies, DeSantis will have to get past the shitgibbon to get the nomination. There is every chance that if he wins that that stupid orange bastard will keep running against him anyway just out of spite, and he’ll lose.

If he waits until 2028, he will be 50– still young. And, very likely, one of two things will have happened: either Joe Biden will have finished his second term, or the shitgibbon will have finished his. Taking up the mantle as the party’s heir apparent in 2028 makes much more sense than trying it in ‘24.

Now, of course, there’s talk that Biden won’t run again. If that happens all bets are off, but for better or for worse I don’t think it’s likely. Hell, I don’t want the guy in office anyway, and for my money the best possible result would be for DeSantis to win the ‘24 R primary and then the shitgibbon to decide to run as an independent. We’d win 45 states and it would be fucking hilarious. But that doesn’t change the fact that it is objectively stupid for him to run in 2024. Keep fucking Florida, dude.