In which my mayor runs for President

It’s a good video. It’s a real good video. I’ve mentioned recently how wild I think it is that my life keeps intersecting with Democratic Presidential candidates– not that I can find the post right now, but I swear I have– and now my mayor Pete Buttigieg has announced that he’s forming an exploratory committee to run for President.

I, uh, don’t really want to be in a position where I have to vote for him. This is a weird thing to write, right? Hell, I didn’t think Barack Obama was ready to run for President early on in his run, when he’d only been in the Senate for two years, and he very quickly proved me completely wrong on that front. Pete Buttigieg passes one of my first smell tests for someone running for President, which is do I think this person is smarter than me, and he also passes my second smell test, which is do I think this person would be a better President than I would. He is, and he would. However, I would be a pretty terrible President, so that second one in particular is kind of a low bar. I do not think that being mayor of a town of 100,000 for, what, six years or so adequately prepares you for the Presidency no matter how good of a mayor I think you were– and don’t misunderstand me, I’m quite fond of the guy. I just don’t know what the hell he’s thinking right now, because even if he’s essentially trying to run for VP he’s up against Mike Pence, and frankly as much as I despise Mike Pence I think Buttigieg is not enough to move Indiana back into the blue column given that a former Governor is the VP right now.

(Fun fact: there have been more Vice Presidents from Indiana, at six, than any state other than New York. There have been two just in my lifetime.)

If I had my druthers– and the world working the way it does, I have actually told him this– Buttigieg would have his eye on the Governor’s mansion or a Senate seat right now. Indiana has had both Democratic Senators and Governors in the not terribly recent past; while the state is pretty uniformly red right now, it’s not going to last forever, and I think we have another wave election or two potentially headed our way at the moment. I think eight or twelve years down the line we will be looking at him much more seriously as a Presidential candidate– again, my main objection is to him running now.  I can very easily imagine a world where I’m happier to vote for him further on down the road.

But hey, I’ve been surprised before. Maybe the dude is even savvier than I think he is and he’ll find a way to light a fire under his candidacy. That would be damned impressive, close to impossible, but maybe. At any rate, it’ll be fun to keep an eye on.

(I am, at the moment, on team Kamala Harris. My affiliation is loose; I haven’t bought a jersey yet or anything, and of the currently declared candidates the only one I really have genuine problems with is Tulsi Gabbard. But just so y’all know where I’m coming from.)

Sure, Why Not: A pointless and uninformed ranking of people who might possibly run for President in 2020

My wife and I called it yesterday when she changed her Twitter handle to remove a reference to Massachusetts: Elizabeth Warren is, if not Officially Running for President, at least forming an exploratory committee for same, which … is pretty much the same damn thing, really. And it turns out that apparently Julián Castro has formed one too, which I didn’t know about.

Now, to be clear, I will literally vote for something scraped off my shoe if it gets the Democratic nomination for President in 2020. Hell, I’ll vote for Bernie Sanders if he gets the nomination, although I might prefer the shoe-scrapings. There’s no particular reason to take this list terribly seriously, other than that I’m sitting in my office waiting for a plumber to show up on New Year’s Eve because every pipe in my Goddamned house decided to overflow at once this morning and I am the only one in the house and bored. Everyone else fled the sewage in the tub for some reason.

That said:

I DON’T KNOW MUCH ABOUT YOU BUT RIGHT NOW I’M IN IF YOU RUN BUT I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO BECOME LESS EXCITED IF NECESSARY:

  • Kamala Harris
  • Cory Booker

I KNOW EVEN LESS ABOUT YOU THAN CATEGORY #1 SO LET’S SAY PROVISIONAL SUPPORT FOR NOW, PENDING FURTHER INFORMATION, AND I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO BECOME MUCH MORE EXCITED:

  • Julián Castro
  • Sherrod Brown
  • Amy Klobuchar
  • Kirsten Gillibrand

I THINK YOU’RE COOL BUT MAYBE WAIT FOR 2028:

  • Beto O’Rourke
  • Andrew Gillum
  • Stacey Abrams
  • Pete Buttigieg

YOU ARE OVER 60 AND/OR A WHITE DUDE AND I WOULD PREFER TO VOTE FOR SOMEONE YOUNGER AND/OR LESS WHITE DUDEY BUT OTHERWISE SURE:

  • Joe Biden
  • Elizabeth Warren

WE DID THIS ALREADY; NO, THANK YOU:

  • John Kerry

OH FUCKING HELL NO/ I HAVE ALREADY DECIDED I DON’T LIKE YOU:

  • Michael Avenatti
  • Michael Bloomberg
  • Bernie Sanders

IF THERE’S ANY FUCKING SANITY LEFT IN THE WORLD, THE ACTUAL NEXT DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES WILL BE:

  • Nancy Pelosi

In which I can work with this

Got the House back.  Things will continue getting worse, but the curve might bend a little bit now.  And there were some bits and bobs of really, really good news last night.

I actually took a leftover Clonazepam before bed last night because I was so keyed up, and today has been busy as hell, so this is gonna be a short note just because I’ve got shit to do tonight.  Watch this, then— I wish I could embed it, but I can’t find a way– and then afterward find somebody who thinks Democrats “don’t have a message” and punch them in their stupid face.

Alhamdulillah.

 

One way or another

…nevertheless, we persist.


giphyI had a stunningly easy day at work today, to the point where I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop and it never really did.  No drama, no nonsense, I had time to get shit done, which blows my mind– that never happens– and now I have tomorrow off.

My wife has to work and my son has school.  So I’m at home, by myself, on Election Day, trying my good Goddamnedest to keep myself distracted.  If there was some sort of drug I could take that could guarantee I could just wake up Wednesday morning and have the carnage already dealt with, I’d already have taken it.

I mean, I could make predictions, but I was literally the wrongest I’ve ever been about anything two years ago, so I’ve got no room left for optimism right now.  I also think I’m probably not capable of being surprised, but the world has a way of proving me wrong about that too.  I considered finding something, anything to volunteer for tomorrow, but to a certain extent I question my own ability to keep my shit together in scenarios where people are talking politics around me, and if I go volunteer for something it’s gonna be kinda difficult to avoid politics.   Better for my mental health to spend the entire day stuck in 1899 robbing caravans and hunting bears.  I gotta stay the hell off Twitter until at least 7 or 8:00; I will fail utterly in this goal.

More tomorrow, I suppose, if the world doesn’t end.

OMG

IMG_7862.JPG

I said something about how I’d never gotten a sticker before so THEY GAVE ME EXTRA and I’m totally wearing one for each of the next three days.