Today was a very special day. Nearly everything that happened today was annoying, but nothing was, like, really annoying, and even taken in the aggregate complaining about my day seems really whiny, even after adjusting for “this is my blog and you’re reading it for free.” It was the kind of annoying day where complaining about all the annoying things that happened is just going to make me seem kinda hateful and grouchy.
I’mma do it anyway.
- Today was a day with no students, so I stopped to grab breakfast at McDonald’s, a minor tradition. I pulled in to the incredibly exciting sight of no line at the drive-thru only to discover that they were so understaffed inside that it still took fifteen minutes to get my food.
- And they got my order wrong, giving me chicken McGriddles instead of my requested McChicken Biscuits; this ordinarily would not be much of a problem, except
- every time I have McGriddles my nose sweats maple syrup for the rest of the fucking day, and since I was at work I had no access to proper face-washing tools or my toothbrush.
- When I got to my classroom, I pulled my keys out of my pocket, then tried to use the remote for my car to unlock my classroom door, then stood there like an idiot for a few moments wondering why my door wouldn’t unlock.
- I didn’t get the email with the Zoom link for the training we were supposed to be doing today, so I was ten minutes late to my meeting, with a pit-stop in the wrong meeting along the way;
- The meeting itself was (predictably) boring as hell;
- My classroom was the exact wrong temperature– too cold to not have a hoodie on, too hot to be wearing a hoodie.
- I tried out the new porn salad place (I’m not explaining, roll with it) and the salad was actually really good except for the bacon being way too salty. Like, way too salty.
- I have never in my life experienced overly-salted bacon before today.
- Yes, my salad featured bacon, shut up
- I did not win teacher of the year
- I got done with everything I had to do today, including my training, an hour before school ended and then got weirdly shy about ducking out early (note that “go when your shit is done” has always been an unwritten rule in this building when the kids aren’t around) so I spent an hour literally just sitting in my chair watching YouTube on my laptop
- Picking out plastic cups at Target on the way home was way more annoying of a chore than it should have been;
- I ended up also having to go to Walgreen’s because I needed candy bars for some of my kids and Target didn’t have one of the candy bars the kids requested, so a whole other trip was necessary
- I got home to discover my wife had made tortellini soup for dinner, which is normally a wonderful thing as it’s one of my favorite foods, except now my nose is sweating garlic instead of maple syrup and I never want to eat again;
- I ordered a fidget ring hoping it would help me curb my disgusting habit of picking at the tips of my fingers. It arrived today and it is exactly 87% of what I wanted it to be but that 13% may make it unusable;
- My son got his second Covid shot today at 6:30, and I don’t know if you’ve noticed this fucking “fall back” daylight savings time bullshit but leaving the house after 5 PM nowadays feels like leaving the house at midnight, because it was fuckdark and snowing outside;
- Twitter is being dumb again.
- I have forgotten something, and whatever I have forgotten was something funny.