Well, crap

The Snowpiercer post has gotten 200 referrals from Instagram in the last 40 minutes or so, and I can’t see exactly where they’re coming from. Typically when this happens it’s because someone’s calling me an idiot somewhere. If anybody’s come here from there and cares to leave a link in comments just so I can see where this is all coming from, that’d be cool. I don’t plan to engage with it, mind you.

In other news…

Right now the only social media account that I have under my actual name is one of my two TikTok accounts. I have one for Luther, but I haven’t posted any videos. I am, however, posting videos under my teacher account, which until about 22 hours ago had about 40 followers. The account was giving me a mild reason to celebrate, though, because I’d just had my first video that scored over 2000 views before fizzling out.

And then I found a video of an Asian woman (her race is relevant) getting a tattoo and noticed that one of her tattoos, oddly, was the word “pizza,” spelled phonetically in Hebrew. (It may be a cognate; I’m not sure.) As the account posting the video was all in (I think) Chinese, and pizza is, as far as I know, not a hugely common food in Southeast Asia, nor are Jews, I made the not-foolproof-but-still-defensible-I-think suggestion that maybe people shouldn’t be tattooed in languages they can’t read and posted a short video saying such.

It’s now at 1.1 million views and counting, with over 60,000 Likes, and I’ve gained over 300 followers since it went up. There is also what appears to be a lively argument in Hebrew and Arabic going on in comments, and I have no idea what the hell they’re talking about, although Palestine may be involved.

I now have a viral Tweet under my belt with over six million views, a viral TikTok, and a couple of viral blog posts, although the biggest viral blog post only had a comparatively-paltry 110,000 views. I think it is fair to suggest that I may be the king of all social media. Now I just need to find a way for it to make me some money. ūüôā

Still going (update)

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…so, about nine hours later, another 1.6 million impressions, or nearly two hundred thousand views per hour. ¬†Completely ridiculous.

Oh, and a couple of people alerted me to this bit of nonsense, which also happened:

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That’s on Instagram, and I’ve been told it was cross-posted to Facebook as well, both with a goddamn “people for Bernie” watermark smacked next to my name and Grond’s face. ¬†I do not approve. ¬†I am very much not a Person for Bernie. ¬†I’m not gonna¬†do anything about it (I thought about posting “I voted for Hillary” in the comments and didn’t) and at this point I’m more entertained by it than anything else, but they could at¬†least have put that asshole’s name next to the¬†first tweet and not mine.

25,000 impressions while I was typing this short post, by the way. ¬†This thing isn’t going away for a bit, yet.

In which I am viral

So yesterday morning I wrote a nine-word snarky response to a tweet from the MIT Tech Review.  I write two or three dozen tweets in more or less exactly the same tone as this one every week.

It appears to have hit a nerve.

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To put this in perspective, this tweet, in barely over a day, has now reached over three times as many people as this¬†entire blog has in the entirety of its existence. ¬†And now that the western hemisphere is starting to wake up again it’s starting to speed up from the 2,000-impressions-per-minute pace that it kept up while I was asleep last night. ¬†I think I’ve probably got a solid day at least before it starts slowing down so I imagine it’ll double those numbers.

I’d kind of prefer that the most popular thing I’ve ever written be a blog post or, God forbid, a book, but it’s still fun watching the numbers go psychotic. ¬†And the ratio is unreal, so I’m not getting a ton of responses relative to the numbers and 98% of them have been supportive. ¬†Not like I have time to notice anybody to argue with them, at any rate.

In which my diamond shoes are too tight

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Damn post is wrecking my graphs.

It is Monday, which makes me feel like the traffic on the Syria post has¬†got to slow down today, but the numbers so far show me differently. ¬†On Saturday, I had 200 pageviews when I woke up in the morning and 500 by noon; on Sunday, 500 when I woke up and 1000 by just after noon, and today I had a thousand by 8:00 in the morning. ¬†It’s 8:44 as I’m typing this. ¬† That picture’s less than five minutes old and it’s 50 hits out of date already.

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This may end up too small to read, but look at¬†that nonsense. ¬†That 468 hourly high is after I went to bed, and I went to bed around 10:30, which means we had like ten straight hours of 350-400 hits per hour yesterday. ¬†There should be a lull in the bell curve around midafternoon, and it¬†ain’t there. ¬†And that early-morning dip is probably¬†still around 100-15o an hour.

The goddamn thing’s gonna catch and pass the Snowpiercer post today. ¬†In six days. ¬†Insanity.

I keep waiting for a troll invasion; I’ve stomped on one post where the person referred to “unvetted” refugees, demonstrating clearly that he had no idea how the refugee process actually works at all, and there have been a couple that I’ve laid a stinkeye on but have left alone. ¬†I’ve made one alteration to the text where a mistake was pointed out and left another alone although I probably ought to edit it a bit. ¬†I’m considering turning off comments today just because I legitimately have a shitton to do (this is my only day without the boy all week) and I don’t know how much time I have to wait for the racist hordes to land on my head.

Another interesting fact: Facebook continues to be just about the sole source for referrers. ¬†You’d think that someone in there¬†somewhere would have dumped the thing onto Zite or StumbleUpon or Reddit or¬†something,¬†but so far this is a Facebook party. ¬†Which could be why I’m not seeing too many trolls; maybe they’re all staying on FB and yelling at people there. ¬†Who knows.

(8:56 AM:  1318 views, meaning the post got 116 views in the less than fifteen minutes it took to write this.)