Nevin Longenecker, my freshman Biology teacher, passed away last week. I was surprised to realize, when I checked, that Mr. Longenecker was not among the teachers who I dedicated Searching for Malumba to. I can sort of reconstruct my logic; every high school teacher I mention on that list was someone who I spent at least multiple years if not all four years of high school with, and I only had the one class with Mr. Longenecker. Among his many accomplishments as an educator was his senior Research Biology seminar, an opportunity that several of my friends participated in and which, over the years, generated literally millions of dollars in research grants. I was not planning on a career in the sciences, so I was not part of that seminar, and Mr. Longenecker’s direct role in my education ended after my freshman year. He was, regardless, one of the finest educators I ever had the pleasure of being in a classroom with.
He started teaching at my high school in 1968. And Adams wasn’t his first school. He taught for sixty-four years in total, and never actually retired, although my understanding is that health reasons prevented him from starting this school year. He started that research program in 1976, the year I was born.
Sixty. Four. Fucking. Years. I am a grown-ass man with white hair and I have sixteen years to go before I have lived as long as he was a teacher. Fifty-six years at the same school, and I’d bet money that hewas still in the same classroom that he occupied when I was there. I’m trying to imagine the pressure of being the next person to move into that room and I can’t do it.
The phrase “rest in peace” has had all the edges rubbed off of it by years and years of use, but I cannot imagine someone who deserves more peace and rest than someone who taught high school for six and a half decades.
Meanwhile, and the reason this isn’t headlined as an RIP post, I logged into my pension website and was greeted with, I believe for the first time, an indication that I was hitting my “retirement goals.”:
I don’t know who generated that $3533 number, for the record, or how or if it’s slid around during my years as an Indiana teacher, but this is the first time that dollar bill has been entirely orange. I don’t want to hear shit from anybody about how bad the economy’s doing; apparently my retirement account is up sixteen percent this year, which is ludicrous. I can’t even move that “might return” slider far enough to the right to account for sixteen percent increases (and, okay, I know it’s not going to last forever, too, but still.)
Anyway, I was happy for a minute, until I saw that retirement age.
68? Sixty-eight? Sixty-eight???? Shit, I’m not even going to be alive at 68 much less wait that long to retire. It turns out that if I play with that slider I can earn an impressive $55 a month if I retire next year, and the magic number appears to be 62, where the orange bar makes a big jump over to the right. That’s still fourteen years out, which feels kinda crazy.
I learned all of this and had all of these thoughts before learning of Mr. Longenecker’s passing. There’s no obituary yet and I’m not sure when he was born, but if he started teaching straight out of college he’d have to have been at least 85. The craziest thing is he was the teacher with the second longest tenure in the district. As far as I know, Bev Beck is still in the classroom.
(For giggles, take a look at the article linked on that page about the “80-year-old teacher” suing the district for age discrimination, and then look at the date on the article.)
I will, nonetheless, not be aspiring to equal either of those people’s feats. That said, I probably ought to start buying lottery tickets.
I’m either getting sick again— which, Christ, please, fucking no– or my medication got directly on top of me after today’s shot, and one way or another I had more ledge-talking-off-talks going on at the end of the day and apparently I’ve become the staff emotional support teacher this year?
It genuinely wasn’t that bad of a week for me, but holy hell am I shot emotionally right now, mostly because of all the heavy lifting I’ve had to do on behalf of other people. I want to play video games for an hour but it’s also 8:33 right now, which makes me twenty-seven minutes away from being able to go to bed without feeling bad about myself, and if I start the process now…
… today was the kind of day where I’m in my room, just after school lets out, when another teacher comes in who needs to vent, and it quickly becomes clear that she doesn’t just need to vent, she needs to be talked off a ledge to some extent, and then while she’s venting, a second teacher comes in to vent, and then a few minutes later a third teacher comes in to vent, and they’re all venting at each other, and okay I kinda had a rough day too, and I don’t mind being everybody’s sounding board, but would y’all mind if I just … went home, and left y’all my room as your private venting space?
No? That would be rude? Well, shit, I guess I’m staying late tonight then.
Dammit.
On the plus side, there was, like, a bomb threat or something called in against all of our middle schools? So maybe everybody will stay home tomorrow.
I ordered some shoes off the Internet. No, not my beloved Kiziks, although I did order yet another pair of those,(*) but some other brand that are going to scan more as a business/work shoe than what I’ve been wearing lately. Am I going to tell you what the shoes are?
No, because they immediately emailed me– and they’ve emailed me several times since– congratulating me for my new status as a “brand ambassador” for them, and explaining how I can get money by getting other people to buy their shoes, and giving me discount codes I can share, and explaining their reimbursement structure, and I’m like … motherfucker, I don’t even have the shoes yet, and can you maybe ask me if I want to be a brand ambassador, maybe a week after I’ve had them, to see if I even like the Goddamn things?
(Also: I ordered these with my real name and personal email address and it’s not like you have to enter your website to buy shoes, so there’s no earthly way they could connect the shoe-buyer with this site. I’ve had things sent to me for review before, and that’s its own thing. I bought these and they think I should sell them as a side gig now. I assume they’re doing this to everyone.)
The aggressiveness is equal parts off-putting and alarming, and honestly it makes me want to return the shoes as soon as they arrive, which is vastly annoying, as I do actually like the looks of the damn things or I wouldn’t have ordered them in the first place.
(*) In all seriousness this is, I think, my fifth pair of Kiziks, and if they want me to be a brand ambassador I’m all over it, but these other folks are gonna have to generate some goodwill with a quickness if they even want to keep the business they already got from me.
Everyone in my house has something abdominal going on right now, although we don’t appear to all have the same thing and in my case I’m pretty sure it’s a medicine side effect. But it’s not exactly leading to the home front being a relaxed and peaceful place to be, what with a bunch of us being in various forms of pain and some of us occasionally needing to spill terrifying amounts of liquid from some orifice or another, often on short notice. I myself stayed home from work today, not because I was too sick to go in but because the precise kind of sick I am means that going to work, where I have to wait for the office to send me coverage in order to go to the bathroom, is an automatic no-go even if I feel absolutely fine 95% of the time. It’s my least favorite thing about teaching, the way we absolutely cannot leave these little crapweasels alone for any amount of time, or half of them will start having sex and the other half will start drinking alcohol and then some of them will set things on fire, possibly while drunk and fucking. And that’s before the fights start.
Sigh.
My classes this year are absolute hell on subs, too, which on the one hand I’m supposed to be professionally angry about and on the other hand what-fuckin’-ever, so long as none of them are dead at the end of the day and they don’t destroy any of my shit. I don’t know why these groups are so bad to outsiders; I’m certainly not having perfect days or anything but, halfway through the first quarter, so far as a whole this is one of my more manageable groups of kids. They just fall the hell apart when I’m not there, to the point where it’s going to start being difficult for the office to convince people to cover for me when I’m not at school.
(I am hoping to make it to November before I miss another day. I’ve already taken the election and the day after off as personal days, and there’s a four-day Fall Break in there, so hopefully I’ll be able to pull this off. Most of my missed time has been medication-related, which, again, annoys the hell out of me.)
Anyway, I’m going to go find a surface to wipe down with bleach. Stay away from norovirus, kids, it’s nasty.
I actually didn’t really have much lesson planning to do tonight, and fell into Black Myth Wukong for a while instead, and now I’m in “I’ve got nothing” mode, so … just go read that book review from yesterday again. It was a good book! I mean it!