Holy whoa

Next comment is number five thousand WHO WILL IT BE?????4482196_orig

Random question for the olds

4899194035_30ee19703f_oI’m guessing you’d need to be at least 30-35 for your answer to this question to matter to me– old enough that you spent your life on analog/wired phones, and that you bought *yourself* your first cell phone.  Two questions:

1) Do you actually remember getting your first cell phone?  Like, was it an Event?  Can you describe the phone, or nail down what year it was that you bought it?

2) Can you remember sending or receiving your first text message?  (Preferably, for the purposes of this question, these two events did not occur on the same day– in other words, you had a cell phone before text messages were a Thing.)

Just curious.  And, for the record, I’m just as interested in the “no” answers as the “Yes, this is when it was” answers, so if you don’t remember one of the two, let me know.  Thanks.

A story for the book nerds

pN6xPI like to pretend I’m smart.  I suppose at some point I’ve probably actually fooled some people into thinking that about me.  Do not believe it.  I am an idiot and I do dumb things all the time, I’m just apparently a convincing liar about my lack of intellect.

I am currently reading Dhalgren, by Samuel Delany.  I’m not quite 2/3 of the way through it; I could finish it in a day if I wanted to, but it’ll probably take a few more evenings of reading to finish.  Now, I purchased the book in February, more or less on a whim, and from Amazon– and fell prey to the Amazon curse where once I physically had the book in my hands I think “Oh, I might not have made a good decision here.”  It literally sat on my to-be-read shelf for ten months before I got to it.  (It wasn’t even the oldest book on the shelf; I have at least one present from last Christmas that I haven’t gotten to yet.)

I recently asked my wife to pick my next book and she grabbed Dhalgren.  The book is well known for being complicated, and I need to be in a very particular frame of mind to read complicated fiction– and for the last couple of years the mental space necessary to achieve that frame of mind simply hasn’t been available very much.  So I sort of mentally groaned when she handed it to me but started it anyway, hoping beyond hope that I’d like it.  Miraculously, so far, I have– but from what I understand I’m only just about to hit the place where the narrative goes off the rails and the whole thing turns into a James Joyce novel.

Anyway.  Here’s the thing– I was actually happy to be finally reading it, to some extent, because even if it was too difficult to read and I didn’t finish it, I’d at least have removed a three-inch-thick, 800-page book that had become a bit of an albatross from my To Be Read shelf, and it would stop staring at me, and I could presumably move on to, like, a Star Wars book or something with zombies in it next with no compunctions.

I got two Barnes and Noble gift cards for Christmas.  We went to Barnes and Noble this afternoon.

I came home with God damned Anathem.

Just shoot me.

In which I whine. A lot.

imagesI am having a quiet brain day, and am about to go out and spend money I shouldn’t have on books I don’t need.

Also, this morning, I finally figured out my theme for the A to Z Challenge, which is in April, and I don’t know why I’m thinking about anything in April already except maybe that Gene’O has crawled into my skull.  And by “figured out my theme,” what I mean is “scheduled every post and figured out all the letters, and want to work on getting those done early today instead of FINISHING THE GODDAMN BENEVOLENCE ARCHIVES BOOK, which is what I ought to be doing.”

I’m so close.  I can taste the end.  I know every story beat between here and there.  Somebody else write it.  God, I hate writer’s block.

In which y’all should learn something

I clearly don’t have enough readers who know hiphop.  Maybe I should start a series of educational posts.  Until then…

The title of the post was also a hiphop reference, although I’m not as fond of this album.  Then again, no one is:

In which I die trying: book sales blogwanking

milk-and-heavy-cream(Note: I’ll provide a free copy of the book of your choice to the first person who figures out the terribly clever joke I’m making with the picture on this post.)

I just took a few minutes to sit down and figure out exactly how my books have done this year.  I’m going to put the take-away right up at the beginning so you don’t have to wait for it: I have indisputably lost money playing at writer this year.  Lost a lot of money, actually.  Now, the good news is that most of the money that I’ve lost wasn’t actually mine, since the grant I got last year paid for everything, but that money would still be in my pocket had I not spent it on writing-related stuff.  (Well, actually, no, it wouldn’t, because I got the grant specifically so that I could play writer this year.)

Do I care?  Actually, no, I don’t, but I won’t be hiring professional artists to do book covers again anytime soon until I figure marketing out.  At any rate: here is all the data I can pull together on how my books did this year, and some musing on what works and what doesn’t.  The long and short of it is, I think I’m probably pretty good at getting people to download stuff for free.  I’m less good at getting people to spend money on my books.  That’s the part I ought to work on.

I released two books this year:  The Benevolence Archives, Vol. 1 released on Amazon on May 10th and everywhere else a couple of months later, and Skylights released everywhere on September 29th.  I have high hopes that the BA novel will release in the first quarter of 2015– I’m hoping for mid- to late March– or very early in the second quarter, and I have a fourth book in the works for later in 2015.  Vague plans exist for the next BA installment in early 2016, with a possible follow-up to Skylights coming after that.  So I’ve got plans.  We’ll see how they work out.

Anyway.  We’ll start with pure sales.  The Benevolence Archives has, as of today, sold 56 copies, all but two of which were through Amazon.  The other two were through the iTunes bookstore.  Skylights has sold 36 copies– two through iTunes, ten through Smashwords, and the remainder through Amazon.  It is possible that there are sales that I don’t know about through non-Smashwords or Amazon distributors, because of the way they report sales to Smashwords, but it’s unlikely that that amounts to more than one or two. If I include my payment from the story I sold to the World Unknown Review, I’ve made… wait for it… $215.89 from my book sales in 2014.  This, as I’ve already said, doesn’t come close to representing profit.  Nowhere near it.  I’m not telling you how much I’ve spent.  I might next year when I’m spending my own money.

Free downloads have been a bit more interesting.  I have given away four copies of Skylights, all through Smashwords, and 550 copies of The Benevolence Archives.  BA has done well at Smashwords; it’s responsible for 102 of those free downloads.  91 people have downloaded the free chapter of Skylights through Smashwords; that chapter is available just about everywhere but only Smashwords lets me know the number of downloads.  I really wish Amazon gave me access to that number but they don’t.  My books were downloaded, one way or another, 646 times in 2014.

People go back and forth on the value of having a free book out there.  As you can see (and this will surprise no one) my books move a lot more copies when they’re free.  It’s possible that BA is just that much better than Skylights, but I think it’s the price.  Very soon I will have the novel available, and my hope is that the free novella will drive sales to my other (non-free) books, especially the ones that are sequels.  I don’t know if this is a wise decision, but comparing sales of BA 2 to Skylights will be very interesting.  For now, I’ll take the exposure over the money– I feel like it’s more valuable in the long run at this time.  And considering that Skylights has had four and a half fewer months to sell and costs 166% of what Benevolence Archives does, I think there’s some evidence that I’m on the right track here.  It’s hardly conclusive, but it’s evidence.

Here’s my Amazon author rank, by the way.  My best day?  My first day on the market:

Screen Shot 2014-12-27 at 11.15.45 AM

For those of you who don’t know this– a single sale can make the difference between an author rank of #650,000 and the high six figures.  Two sales in a day will usually break you into the top 100K.  A day of no sales will lose you 30-40K in ranking or so.  There’s an enormous amount of volatility built into those rankings, and I suspect most Amazon authors are selling no more than one or two books a week.  Remember something: I’ve never had a day of double-digit sales.  Not once.  Even the day BA launched.  And that day was good for #35,792.  My high day of free giveaways was 290 downloads, which had me briefly at #1 in the world for free science fiction books.

Here’s the thing: I can easily imagine someone looking at these numbers, particularly that $215.89, and thinking “Man.  That was not worth the effort.”  And… well, I can understand that.  My perspective, on the other hand, is that in April of 2014 I had never convinced anyone in the world ever to pay me money to write words and as of right now there have been ninety-three instances of human beings deliberately giving me their money for my writing.  And not at gunpoint or anything!  My mom can’t be all of those people. My books have been downloaded six hundred and forty-six times.  This is insane!  I don’t know 646 people!  I cannot pretend that this is bad news.  Now, do I hope I do better next year?  Yes, definitely.  But for my first seven months as an author?  I’m not complaining at all.

I was going to muse about marketing a bit, but this sentence is going to push this post over 1000 words already, so maybe I’ll save it for later this week and call it “How to Sell Books Online,” like I know what I’m doing.

Indie authors: how am I doing?  How are you doing?

#Blogwanking for 2014: #WordPress and #Twitter

Usual caveats apply: I’m providing this information because I think it’s interesting and I know some of you like to read about it; I’m neither bragging nor whining, just providing my data, which will be better than some of you and not as good as others.  There will be one more 2014 wrap-up post sometime in the next few days where I break down all of my book sales for the year.  That one will be interesting as I don’t actually know what the numbers are going to look like just yet.  I haven’t actually tried to combine all of the spreadsheets Amazon’s given me into one place, much less combined all the places my books are available.

But unto the breach!  Here’s what my traffic has looked like so far:

Screen Shot 2014-12-26 at 4.23.46 PM

Sadly, the huge traffic surge in January and February has yet to repeat itself.  The low point in the year was in April, and traffic has been on an upswing since September.  I expect December to just barely edge November out, but not by much, since I’m not expecting much traffic on New Year’s Eve and the last few days were unsurprisingly very low-traffic.  Interesting things happen when I look at the bar graph, though:

Screen Shot 2014-12-26 at 4.24.28 PM

The highest number of visitors I’ve ever had was last month, at 3822, and this month is definitely going to be in second place for visitors overall by the time it’s done.  I blame the surge of visitors on the Snowpiercer post; compared to January and February I have more people looking at the blog but they’re not looking at nearly as many posts.  Historically I have a really high visitor to page view ratio; that’s been closing up lately as the Snowpiercer post attracts lots of visitors who don’t necessarily stick around.  February 2014 had a ridiculous 4:1 page view: visitor ratio, which I can only attribute to it being frozen and cold outside and no one being able to leave the house.

Here’s the geography data, which is always my favorite part.  First, the highest and lowest-visiting countries:

Screen Shot 2014-12-26 at 4.29.58 PMScreen Shot 2014-12-26 at 4.30.38 PM

The interesting surprise here is Puerto Rico; I don’t think I’d had any visitors from the island at the end of 2013 and it’s in the Top 10 for countries/geographical regions/whatchamacallems for 2014.  Here’s the map:

Screen Shot 2014-12-26 at 4.30.09 PM

Pretty well filled-in, I’d say.  The only countries in the Americas I haven’t seen traffic from are Cuba and French Guiana; I’m probably going to have to keep waiting for a while on French Guiana but I’m hoping Cuba shows up in the near future as relations between our countries continue to thaw.  Kosovo is still a white spot in Europe, and I’m becoming more and more convinced that the way WP figures out geography actually makes it impossible for traffic in actual-Kosovo to register as being from Kosovo.  Most of the rest of the countries that I haven’t seen traffic from are some combination of dictatorships, theocracies, sparsely populated, or desperately poor.

On to Twitter!  There’s only one graph here, and I’ve fiddled with it a bit to show a bunch of information at once:

Screen Shot 2014-12-26 at 4.33.12 PMI have, as of this exact second, 3,532 followers on Twitter.  (4,373 on the blog, by the way, but I don’t have a graph for that.)  As you can see, nearly all of those have been this year, and 6/7 of them or so have been in the last six months.  I’ve gone through two big surges where I was trying to aggressively add followers, one at the beginning of the summer and one in the last month or so.  I’ve added fifteen hundred followers in the last four weeks, and I haven’t decided yet if I want this growth spurt to end at 4,000 or 5,000.

The way I’m doing this, by the way, is pretty simple.  I use JustUnfollow’s feature where you can pull followers from other people, to make sure that the pools of folks I’m looking at are probably interested in the same stuff I am.  So I might decide to look at people following, say, Sourcerer’s account.   And I follow 250 or so people.  A couple of days later, I unfollow the ones who haven’t followed back, which JustUnfollow makes easy.  If someone catches my eye who doesn’t follow me back, it has a whitelist feature that will let me keep them so that I don’t accidentally unfollow.  Lather, rinse, repeat.  Generally about a third of any given group will follow back if I give them a couple of days.

This method, by the way, makes it essential that you use lists in Twitter, because once you’re following thousands of people your basic feed becomes a firehose that no one can pay attention to other than to catch a sense of what people are talking about.  I have a list called “writers” that I put anyone I want to pay special attention to into; not all of them are writers but I haven’t bothered to change the name of the list.  That’s just over a hundred people right now and is much more manageable; I generally put anyone in it who I interact with more than a couple of times and anyone who I find interesting regardless of whether they interact with me.  Right now if I send out a Tweet it’ll reach 120 people or so if it isn’t RTed by anyone, and I’ve reached a point where most of my tweets will be responded to somehow by someone, which is nice.  Twitter’s more fun if you’re talking to people, obviously.

The Facebook page has 96 Likes.  It’s seen some attention lately, but I have doubts as to whether it’s ever going to have any real numbers– especially since my sporadic attempts to drive attention to it don’t seem to work too well.

I continue to accept any and all friend requests on Goodreads; I have 151 friends currently, which is more than my “real” account has on Facebook, which makes me feel like I’m doing something right.

Later this week, book sales.  How did your blog do in 2014?

Because I know some of y’all got e-readers for Christmas

Yesterday ended with a massive allergy attack– fun!– so I’m kinda lethargic today.  But not too lethargic to pimp my books:

Screen Shot 2014-12-26 at 10.35.45 AMScreen Shot 2014-12-12 at 9.32.49 PM

 

 

 

 

Both of these are links to PayHip, which means that the money goes directly to me without any intermediary other than hosting fees. Benevolence Archives is listed as “Free+,” meaning you can have it for free or you can pay what you like. The books are available as ePub files. If you’d prefer to buy from Amazon, you can get Benevolence Archives for $2.99 here, and Skylights for $4.99 here.

(And, while I’m at it, a reminder that I’m also published in the 2014 World Unknown Review, available for a mere ninety-nine of your Americapennies from Amazon here.)

Descriptions follow:

The Benevolence Archives:  Troll evictions! Dwarf pirates! Daring rescues! Angry gods! Impossible technology! Oversized bars! Pissed-off ogres! Disrespectful spaceships! All this and a mild disregard for proper wound treatment!

THE BENEVOLENCE ARCHIVES, VOL. 1 is a novella-length collection of six short stories set in a common universe. Combining elements of space opera-style science fiction and high fantasy, THE BENEVOLENCE ARCHIVES tell the adventures of Brazel, Rhundi, and Grond, a gnome/halfogre team of smugglers.

THE PLANET IT’S FARTHEST FROM: A simple job in a saloon goes poorly for Brazel.
THE CLOSET: Brazel and Grond are hired to teach someone why gambling can be a bad idea.
YANK: Dwarven pirates. ‘Nuff said.
REMEMBER: Brazel and Grond are hired by one of the galaxy’s most powerful people for a suspiciously easy job.
THE CONTRACT: Rhundi tries to get through a simple business negotiation without anyone being shot.
THE SIGIL: Brazel and Grond encounter something horrifying on a frozen rock in the middle of nowhere.

SKYLIGHTS:  August 15, 2022: the Tycho, the most advanced interplanetary craft ever designed by the human race, launches from Earth on an expedition to Mars. The Tycho carries four passengers, soon to be the most famous people in human history.

February 19, 2023: The Tycho loses all communication with Earth while orbiting Mars. After weeks of determined attempts to reestablish contact, the Tycho is declared lost.

2027: Journalist Gabriel Southern receives a message from a mysterious caller: “Mars.” Ezekiel ben Zahav isn’t talking, but he wants Southern to accompany him for something– and he’s dangling enough money under his nose to make any amount of hardship worth it.

SKYLIGHTS is the story of the second human expedition to Mars, sent to find out what happened to the first.